Thank you for 14 amazing months; use the links on the sidebar to navigate this site.
Friday, June 16, 2006
Can I just Say...?
I have found the most wonderful program! I had literally spent hours trying to archive my blog into Microssoft Word and Adobe PDF formats, with limited success. However, cruising through the BloggerHelp boards, I found a cute little diddy (totally free, too) that completely mirrors your blog! Images, comments, links and all!
If you wnat to immortalize your blog experience into a very nice looking HTML package, I highly recommend WinHTTrack Website Copier.
You won't be disappointed...
If you wnat to immortalize your blog experience into a very nice looking HTML package, I highly recommend WinHTTrack Website Copier.
You won't be disappointed...
On a Related Note...
Alex the Girl is taking a final bow.
She is largely responsible for yours truly even having a blog. I followed her site for probably a good two years before dipping my feet in the blogging pond, and the rest is history... well, literally.
Her content has such a unique blend to it; a reflection of her fascinating background and many travels. Born of these things is a truly amazing perspective on so many different items, events and places...
Check her out before she's gone for good. Especially her older writings.
She is largely responsible for yours truly even having a blog. I followed her site for probably a good two years before dipping my feet in the blogging pond, and the rest is history... well, literally.
Her content has such a unique blend to it; a reflection of her fascinating background and many travels. Born of these things is a truly amazing perspective on so many different items, events and places...
Check her out before she's gone for good. Especially her older writings.
Even More Festivities...
Tonight, after the drinking, dancing, loitering, carousing, etc., started to slow down a bit, I noticed a rather large buzzing sound in my house. It wasn't:
Having a dangerous delusion that somehow, because I have tools, that I am a handyman... I went to work on it. I removed the circuit board and tied it to another part of the furnace. Then, stared at the blower fan assembly which, I swear, must have been welded into place by a small colony of Lilliputians. Finally, I located two screws which, after having been removed, allowed the entire fan assembly to slide ride out of the furnace. The fan motor was covered and imbibed with dust. Apparently, at least one of those furnace filters wasn't doing its job.
So, after having vacuumed a lot of dust out of the motor, and blowing the rest out using an air hose, I got the motor to work again, but it took a while to spin up. So me, being Nilo the Tool-Man Taylor, decided to remove the motor completely for an extensive cleaning. You can seriously save a couple hundred clams that way, and when you have four sproglets with hungry little mouths to feed, a couple hundred clams appears much larger.
So that is my weekend project; getting our air conditioning back to normal before the next heat wave...
And to think, I was going to be working on some pictures and stories for you tonight... Silly Wabbit...
- A large bumblebee
- My ears ringing
- The clothes dryer telling me the laundry is done
- The blower fan of the air conditioning unit, trying to start.
Having a dangerous delusion that somehow, because I have tools, that I am a handyman... I went to work on it. I removed the circuit board and tied it to another part of the furnace. Then, stared at the blower fan assembly which, I swear, must have been welded into place by a small colony of Lilliputians. Finally, I located two screws which, after having been removed, allowed the entire fan assembly to slide ride out of the furnace. The fan motor was covered and imbibed with dust. Apparently, at least one of those furnace filters wasn't doing its job.
So, after having vacuumed a lot of dust out of the motor, and blowing the rest out using an air hose, I got the motor to work again, but it took a while to spin up. So me, being Nilo the Tool-Man Taylor, decided to remove the motor completely for an extensive cleaning. You can seriously save a couple hundred clams that way, and when you have four sproglets with hungry little mouths to feed, a couple hundred clams appears much larger.
So that is my weekend project; getting our air conditioning back to normal before the next heat wave...
And to think, I was going to be working on some pictures and stories for you tonight... Silly Wabbit...
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Now Starts The Viewing...
Good Evening, Ladies & Gentlemen...
This is your dying host here. It is now just minutes away from 8:00pm Mountain Time... Let the synchronized drinking begin!
Yours truly has cracked open an ice cold Dr. Pepper for the occasion, being that I gave up alcohol 17 years ago.
Imagine yourselves in a tavern where drink and merriment abound... A coffin placed across two of the tables with yours truly inside.
You're invited to dance on top if you feel like it... especially if it's pole dancing, cause I've got a great view from where I am...
As far as being able to chat tonight... You can try to contact me at nilothegreat@yahoo.com, but I'm trying to figure out Trillian... all this while holding a toddler on my lap...
Update: 8:40pm
I've given up on trying to figure the chat thing out, my baby son is having a screaming "pop a vein in the forehead" tantrum, and I'd swear he's trying to take the keyboard away from me... so, no chat tonight. But between tonight and tomorrow, I'll be adding little occasional posts for the viewing, along with some parting words at the end.
Have a wonderful evening, and try the peanuts and pretzels in the bowl over there on the bar...
This is your dying host here. It is now just minutes away from 8:00pm Mountain Time... Let the synchronized drinking begin!
Yours truly has cracked open an ice cold Dr. Pepper for the occasion, being that I gave up alcohol 17 years ago.
Imagine yourselves in a tavern where drink and merriment abound... A coffin placed across two of the tables with yours truly inside.
You're invited to dance on top if you feel like it... especially if it's pole dancing, cause I've got a great view from where I am...
As far as being able to chat tonight... You can try to contact me at nilothegreat@yahoo.com, but I'm trying to figure out Trillian... all this while holding a toddler on my lap...
Update: 8:40pm
I've given up on trying to figure the chat thing out, my baby son is having a screaming "pop a vein in the forehead" tantrum, and I'd swear he's trying to take the keyboard away from me... so, no chat tonight. But between tonight and tomorrow, I'll be adding little occasional posts for the viewing, along with some parting words at the end.
Have a wonderful evening, and try the peanuts and pretzels in the bowl over there on the bar...
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Coming Clean
Okay, time for me to lay my cards out on the table here.
First off, I'd like to say "Wow". I was honestly stunned (and flattered, of course) by Kingfisher's comment to my last post. And I hadn't intended to sound like a martyr, and I hadn't thought I had sounded like a martyr, but looking back I can see that yes, there is certainly a degree of "Drama Queen" to the recent posts. My apologies.
I've seen people stage blog deaths for attention, and I've seen others just walk away, leaving the rest of us wondering what the hell happened. I didn't really want mine to go that way. So when I picked a date, and advertised it on my header... well, there's a story behind that. Pull up a chair, this will take a minute or two.
First off, many of you have probably guessed that my actual name isn't Nilo. And while I'll forgo revealing my secret identity here, I will tell you where "Nilo" comes from.
Five years ago this Friday, a young woman in our area died in a car accident. And I don't expect you to understand why or how, but this girl who I had never met before (and likely never would have met) affected me more profoundly in my life than almost any other event.
Her name was Nila.
She was someone who was a friend to everyone, and would often reach out to others in quiet and unassuming ways. My original intention was to honor her through my words and the way I live... to keep a part of her alive in me, which is something I still try to do to this day. And this blog was originally going to be part of that effort, except that somehow, over the past year I have allowed it to evolve according to the expectations of others, and have not been true to my own self. The parts of me you usually see, are the parts that generate conversation in the comments log, or high ratings through the StatCounter. I found myself wearing a mask, often disguising much of who I really am, for the sake of being accepted by my online peer group. I was whoring myself out for stats, and little tidbits of praise. And I've become less and less comfortable with tacking Nila's name to this whole venture, because so much of this just isn't her.
And while my real life personality isn't drastically different from what you see here, there is just so much more of it that you don't see. An example...
Several years ago, after having worked a late shift at a local mall, I drove down to pick up some dinner at Burger King at about 10:00pm. I recognized a man sitting on the bus bench nearby as a man who worked in the Utah Industries for the Blind store inside the mall. I pulled up next to him and asked him where he was heading. He was going home, which was located on the other side of the Salt Lake Valley... This trip would have taken probably a good hour during the daytime, but by now a lot of the routes had stopped running for the night. There wasn't any guarantee he would be dropped off anywhere near his home. And so I picked him up and drove him home, which trip took probably about 45 minutes out of my own schedule, but I didn't think twice about it. I have a big heart for people... especially people in need. That fact didn't especially shine through in my blog, did it?
Most of you know how quickly my language can degenerate... especially while driving among the great idiots of the road. However, did you know that this Mr. Potty-Mouth here also teaches a children's Sunday School class? And I am goooood at it, too. I'm the teacher that all the kids like, because I bring candy as bribery for good behavior, and often use Fisher-Price toys as props. And apparently it works, because pretty much all of my kids can remember most of the Old Testament stories that I've taught them.
So just a couple of examples of the different parts of me that are missing from the blog. Moving on...
Also conspicuously absent from the blog are a lot of details from my home life. From what I've written, it would be hard to tell that my marriage has been teetering dangerously close to doom over the past several months. This is in conjunction with the mid-life crisis which started right around my birthday. And yes, even though I've joked about it, I've been weathering a full-blown mid-life crisis... at age 37. So I guess this means that I'll probably only live to be 74?
In addition to all of this, I have a wonderful friend that I met in the beginning days of my blog... who has become so much more than just a friend. (Sorry guys... she doesn't have a blog; you can't check her out.)
So over the past year, we've maintained a correspondence, getting to know more and more about each other, sharing many of the same interests, outlooks and philosophies on so many different things. And I realized that I felt so much more for her than just friendship. She sees things in me that I could never have seen in myself, and she has a way of making me feel like I'm ten feet tall and bulletproof... like I can take on the world, and win. She has made me feel more alive than I have in years, and I am so very grateful for that "awakening". She has become so very dear to me, and I love her to pieces! And for those of you who think this spells "certain doom" for my marriage, I invite you to read a little further.
This friend of mine woke me up to the fact that I can and should expect more from life that what I was currently experiencing. I didn't get married to trash the whole thing in a divorce some eleven years later. My wife and I started examining our relationship, and started communicating. We've made some changes, and are starting to head in a better direction than we were. Part of these changes involve my wife (who has been a stay-at-home-mom for 9 years now) rediscovering herself, and setting some goals for herself. I'm watching her start to come alive again, and it's a wonderful metamorphosis to see. Of course, this means even less time for blogging...
And Sleepless Mama? Sssshhhhhhhh! That other blog is still somewhat a secret... *chuckling*
The "other" blog is one I started last September, when I thought I was going to ditch this one. It only has about four or five posts, and shows a lot of what's missing from this blog... the deep and reflective side.
Sometimes, instead of trying to remodel and re-decorate a house, it's better to raze the whole thing and start fresh. This is really what I want to do with the blog: The name will have nothing to do with Paige Hemmis, and will include more of a full-bodied version of me than this one currently does. I will, however, be taking a sabbatical of probably a few months before this "resurrection" (or perhaps, more appropriately) "reincarnation" takes place. When I do get it up and running, I will notify those on my blogroll of the new address...
And honestly, I doubt there will be another 9 or 10 posts. Maybe it's a tiny bit obsessive/compulsive, but I wanted to end on a nice, round number of posts... in this case, 250. But I think I'll let that one go.
I had originally wanted to do a "blog funeral" on Friday night, but I'll actually be ice skating with my family that night. So maybe we could do a viewing on Thursday? I had wanted to do sort of an "Irish wake" type thing, and one of my dear online friends suggested having everyone take a drink at the same time, since the logistics of getting us all together in a bar are nigh near impossible. The idea has terrific merit. And so, for those of you who want to participate, the "Drink" would be Thursday evening, 10:00pm Eastern time, 7:00pm Pacific time... and of course you can do the math for the two time zones in between. Your choice of drinks: Liquor, beer, soda, juice, milk, water... whatever. Let's have fun with this. I also have chat capability through Yahoo Chat so far, and if my baby son isn't too fussy Thursday night, I'll be able to do a little bit of that. Oh, and a last will and testament... and a few parting shots maybe... ;)
Wow. That was a long post for me! Does this shed a little light on my intentions?
First off, I'd like to say "Wow". I was honestly stunned (and flattered, of course) by Kingfisher's comment to my last post. And I hadn't intended to sound like a martyr, and I hadn't thought I had sounded like a martyr, but looking back I can see that yes, there is certainly a degree of "Drama Queen" to the recent posts. My apologies.
I've seen people stage blog deaths for attention, and I've seen others just walk away, leaving the rest of us wondering what the hell happened. I didn't really want mine to go that way. So when I picked a date, and advertised it on my header... well, there's a story behind that. Pull up a chair, this will take a minute or two.
First off, many of you have probably guessed that my actual name isn't Nilo. And while I'll forgo revealing my secret identity here, I will tell you where "Nilo" comes from.
Five years ago this Friday, a young woman in our area died in a car accident. And I don't expect you to understand why or how, but this girl who I had never met before (and likely never would have met) affected me more profoundly in my life than almost any other event.
Her name was Nila.
She was someone who was a friend to everyone, and would often reach out to others in quiet and unassuming ways. My original intention was to honor her through my words and the way I live... to keep a part of her alive in me, which is something I still try to do to this day. And this blog was originally going to be part of that effort, except that somehow, over the past year I have allowed it to evolve according to the expectations of others, and have not been true to my own self. The parts of me you usually see, are the parts that generate conversation in the comments log, or high ratings through the StatCounter. I found myself wearing a mask, often disguising much of who I really am, for the sake of being accepted by my online peer group. I was whoring myself out for stats, and little tidbits of praise. And I've become less and less comfortable with tacking Nila's name to this whole venture, because so much of this just isn't her.
And while my real life personality isn't drastically different from what you see here, there is just so much more of it that you don't see. An example...
Several years ago, after having worked a late shift at a local mall, I drove down to pick up some dinner at Burger King at about 10:00pm. I recognized a man sitting on the bus bench nearby as a man who worked in the Utah Industries for the Blind store inside the mall. I pulled up next to him and asked him where he was heading. He was going home, which was located on the other side of the Salt Lake Valley... This trip would have taken probably a good hour during the daytime, but by now a lot of the routes had stopped running for the night. There wasn't any guarantee he would be dropped off anywhere near his home. And so I picked him up and drove him home, which trip took probably about 45 minutes out of my own schedule, but I didn't think twice about it. I have a big heart for people... especially people in need. That fact didn't especially shine through in my blog, did it?
Most of you know how quickly my language can degenerate... especially while driving among the great idiots of the road. However, did you know that this Mr. Potty-Mouth here also teaches a children's Sunday School class? And I am goooood at it, too. I'm the teacher that all the kids like, because I bring candy as bribery for good behavior, and often use Fisher-Price toys as props. And apparently it works, because pretty much all of my kids can remember most of the Old Testament stories that I've taught them.
So just a couple of examples of the different parts of me that are missing from the blog. Moving on...
Also conspicuously absent from the blog are a lot of details from my home life. From what I've written, it would be hard to tell that my marriage has been teetering dangerously close to doom over the past several months. This is in conjunction with the mid-life crisis which started right around my birthday. And yes, even though I've joked about it, I've been weathering a full-blown mid-life crisis... at age 37. So I guess this means that I'll probably only live to be 74?
In addition to all of this, I have a wonderful friend that I met in the beginning days of my blog... who has become so much more than just a friend. (Sorry guys... she doesn't have a blog; you can't check her out.)
So over the past year, we've maintained a correspondence, getting to know more and more about each other, sharing many of the same interests, outlooks and philosophies on so many different things. And I realized that I felt so much more for her than just friendship. She sees things in me that I could never have seen in myself, and she has a way of making me feel like I'm ten feet tall and bulletproof... like I can take on the world, and win. She has made me feel more alive than I have in years, and I am so very grateful for that "awakening". She has become so very dear to me, and I love her to pieces! And for those of you who think this spells "certain doom" for my marriage, I invite you to read a little further.
This friend of mine woke me up to the fact that I can and should expect more from life that what I was currently experiencing. I didn't get married to trash the whole thing in a divorce some eleven years later. My wife and I started examining our relationship, and started communicating. We've made some changes, and are starting to head in a better direction than we were. Part of these changes involve my wife (who has been a stay-at-home-mom for 9 years now) rediscovering herself, and setting some goals for herself. I'm watching her start to come alive again, and it's a wonderful metamorphosis to see. Of course, this means even less time for blogging...
And Sleepless Mama? Sssshhhhhhhh! That other blog is still somewhat a secret... *chuckling*
The "other" blog is one I started last September, when I thought I was going to ditch this one. It only has about four or five posts, and shows a lot of what's missing from this blog... the deep and reflective side.
Sometimes, instead of trying to remodel and re-decorate a house, it's better to raze the whole thing and start fresh. This is really what I want to do with the blog: The name will have nothing to do with Paige Hemmis, and will include more of a full-bodied version of me than this one currently does. I will, however, be taking a sabbatical of probably a few months before this "resurrection" (or perhaps, more appropriately) "reincarnation" takes place. When I do get it up and running, I will notify those on my blogroll of the new address...
And honestly, I doubt there will be another 9 or 10 posts. Maybe it's a tiny bit obsessive/compulsive, but I wanted to end on a nice, round number of posts... in this case, 250. But I think I'll let that one go.
I had originally wanted to do a "blog funeral" on Friday night, but I'll actually be ice skating with my family that night. So maybe we could do a viewing on Thursday? I had wanted to do sort of an "Irish wake" type thing, and one of my dear online friends suggested having everyone take a drink at the same time, since the logistics of getting us all together in a bar are nigh near impossible. The idea has terrific merit. And so, for those of you who want to participate, the "Drink" would be Thursday evening, 10:00pm Eastern time, 7:00pm Pacific time... and of course you can do the math for the two time zones in between. Your choice of drinks: Liquor, beer, soda, juice, milk, water... whatever. Let's have fun with this. I also have chat capability through Yahoo Chat so far, and if my baby son isn't too fussy Thursday night, I'll be able to do a little bit of that. Oh, and a last will and testament... and a few parting shots maybe... ;)
Wow. That was a long post for me! Does this shed a little light on my intentions?
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Friday, June 9, 2006
The Valley of Indecision
And so I'm thinking to myself over the past week, re-reading some of my earlier posts as I archive them into PDF format "Self, no matter what you say, you're gonna miss this"
I'm going to miss having my spirits lifted by people who I've never met face to face, and probably never will; I'm going to miss having my point of view expanded by a good discussion; I'm going to miss the friendship and camaraderie that I've found in each one of the people I've met through this endeavor.
"So if you're gonna miss it so damn much, why not stay?" you may ask. Welllll... There have been some changes in my life recently, changes that demand a lot of time and focus. Rather than just fade away, and leave my blog out there to rot, I've decided to just take it down. A good clean exit.
And so one week from tonight, at the stroke of midnight (Utah time), the blog will be no more. There'll be a "tombstone" for about a week, and then "No Paige Hemmis Pics Here" will be nothing more than a memory... or a bad aftertaste for some.
I should have about 10 more posts to wrap things up, so drop on by in the next few days, ya hear?
Nilo
I'm going to miss having my spirits lifted by people who I've never met face to face, and probably never will; I'm going to miss having my point of view expanded by a good discussion; I'm going to miss the friendship and camaraderie that I've found in each one of the people I've met through this endeavor.
"So if you're gonna miss it so damn much, why not stay?" you may ask. Welllll... There have been some changes in my life recently, changes that demand a lot of time and focus. Rather than just fade away, and leave my blog out there to rot, I've decided to just take it down. A good clean exit.
And so one week from tonight, at the stroke of midnight (Utah time), the blog will be no more. There'll be a "tombstone" for about a week, and then "No Paige Hemmis Pics Here" will be nothing more than a memory... or a bad aftertaste for some.
I should have about 10 more posts to wrap things up, so drop on by in the next few days, ya hear?
Nilo
Thursday, June 8, 2006
Ding Dong...
>...The evil sonofabitch is dead!
Abu Musab al-Zarqawi killed in air raid
I have not a single molecule of remorse for the violent passing of this madman, save it be that his death wasn't a lot slower and more excruciating.
It would have been nice to have him suffer as he made others suffer. But perhaps that is yet to come...
If I were an Iraqi, I'd bury this asshole clutching a bag of pork rinds...
Abu Musab al-Zarqawi killed in air raid
I have not a single molecule of remorse for the violent passing of this madman, save it be that his death wasn't a lot slower and more excruciating.
It would have been nice to have him suffer as he made others suffer. But perhaps that is yet to come...
If I were an Iraqi, I'd bury this asshole clutching a bag of pork rinds...
Tuesday, June 6, 2006
I have been ousted!
Just when I was getting fitted for my own cloak and scythe...
I was talking to the older guy who works at the convenience store down the road yesterday, and apparently 14 people that he has known have died since March! .....14!!!
Let's give it up for the new "Vortex of Death"..... Vern!!!
I will be claiming my title as "Vortex of Dread Disease". Kind of ironic that I want to go back to school to become a doctor, no?
I was talking to the older guy who works at the convenience store down the road yesterday, and apparently 14 people that he has known have died since March! .....14!!!
Let's give it up for the new "Vortex of Death"..... Vern!!!
I will be claiming my title as "Vortex of Dread Disease". Kind of ironic that I want to go back to school to become a doctor, no?
Sunday, June 4, 2006
A Parental Question...
Something I have been pondering for several months now...
Is there some bizarre law of physics that makes my baby son's poop shoot straight up his back and out of his diaper, both counteracting the law of gravity and staining one of my favorite shirts in the process?
Enquiring parental mind wants to know...
Is there some bizarre law of physics that makes my baby son's poop shoot straight up his back and out of his diaper, both counteracting the law of gravity and staining one of my favorite shirts in the process?
Enquiring parental mind wants to know...
Saturday, June 3, 2006
My Alma Mater is no more
I just barely found out that my old high school has been demolished. Four years of heaven and hell, smiles, laughter, blood, sweat and tears has been reduced to a pile of rubble.
Apparently, my little hometown is burgeoning into quite the city... a large, snooty rich-person's city, with a huge $26 million high school in the works.
Goodbye, little high school... barely 25 years old. Goodbye sleepy little town that once I knew.
Apparently, my little hometown is burgeoning into quite the city... a large, snooty rich-person's city, with a huge $26 million high school in the works.
Goodbye, little high school... barely 25 years old. Goodbye sleepy little town that once I knew.
Thursday, June 1, 2006
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Update on our Friends
We talked to our friends who are dealing with stage 3 breast cancer last weekend.
After much research, talking to a lot of people, meditating and praying on the subject, they have chosen to go with the surgery / chemotherapy / radiation route. I feel that one of the most important things in choosing a method of treatment, is to be comfortable with it. I'm happy that they did take all options into consideration, though.
She'll be going under the knife this Thursday to have her breast and lymph nodes removed, so if you can spare a thought or prayer, it would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.
After much research, talking to a lot of people, meditating and praying on the subject, they have chosen to go with the surgery / chemotherapy / radiation route. I feel that one of the most important things in choosing a method of treatment, is to be comfortable with it. I'm happy that they did take all options into consideration, though.
She'll be going under the knife this Thursday to have her breast and lymph nodes removed, so if you can spare a thought or prayer, it would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.
An Award For Tess
"Tess" being short for Countess
I forgot to properly and publicy credit and thank Countess for introducing me to Matthew Good's music...
So Tess, even though this award bears a striking resemblance to the "Emmy" award for excellence in television broadcasting, it's actually an "O-yeah" award for excellence in blog content.
Though the inscription on the award is somewhat illegible in the picture, it reads: "To Countess - A Hot-lookin' Canadian Woman who runs a kickass blog and has good taste in friends and music... May you treasure this award always!"
(I hope this was worth the wait).... ;)
I forgot to properly and publicy credit and thank Countess for introducing me to Matthew Good's music...
So Tess, even though this award bears a striking resemblance to the "Emmy" award for excellence in television broadcasting, it's actually an "O-yeah" award for excellence in blog content.
Though the inscription on the award is somewhat illegible in the picture, it reads: "To Countess - A Hot-lookin' Canadian Woman who runs a kickass blog and has good taste in friends and music... May you treasure this award always!"
(I hope this was worth the wait).... ;)
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
What would You do?
Earlier this year, my supervisor's brother-in-law was diagnosed as having esophageal cancer. When considering different treatments, I piped up and told my supervisor about a clinic that my doctor refers all of his cancer patients to.
Over the years, my doctor has sent over 300 patients to a specialty clinic in Tijuana, Mexico. A lot of these patients had pretty grim prognoses. Out of those three hundred plus people, only one ever died. Almost all of the others made full and amazing recoveries. That's a pretty good track record, I think.
The brother-in-law chose the route of traditional medicine... surgery, radiation and chemotherapy.
He had over half of his esophagus removed, and his stomach relocated into his upper chest cavity, near the shoulder (I can't even imagine how wierd that must be). After about six weeks of recovering from the surgery, and following his regiment of radiation and chemo, they discover a tumor on his spine.
The doctor surgically removes most of the tumor on his spine, saying that things looked pretty good down there. That was a week ago.
This morning came the grim news that the cancer has spread to his lungs and his liver. This man does not have long to live...
He's roughly 35 years old, and has five children, one of them a newborn.
And now...
We found out last weekend that one of our best friends has stage 3 breast cancer, five months into her pregnancy. In talking with her husband, I pleaded "Please, just look into this clinic in Mexico... just at least give it some consideration..."
What they choose to do remains to be seen...
My question to you is: What would you do in this situation?
Is the idea of holistic health so far outside of people's rational thinking, that even with a better than 99% success rate, it is turned down in favor of a known path of pain and sickness?
Just wondering out loud...
Over the years, my doctor has sent over 300 patients to a specialty clinic in Tijuana, Mexico. A lot of these patients had pretty grim prognoses. Out of those three hundred plus people, only one ever died. Almost all of the others made full and amazing recoveries. That's a pretty good track record, I think.
The brother-in-law chose the route of traditional medicine... surgery, radiation and chemotherapy.
He had over half of his esophagus removed, and his stomach relocated into his upper chest cavity, near the shoulder (I can't even imagine how wierd that must be). After about six weeks of recovering from the surgery, and following his regiment of radiation and chemo, they discover a tumor on his spine.
The doctor surgically removes most of the tumor on his spine, saying that things looked pretty good down there. That was a week ago.
This morning came the grim news that the cancer has spread to his lungs and his liver. This man does not have long to live...
He's roughly 35 years old, and has five children, one of them a newborn.
And now...
We found out last weekend that one of our best friends has stage 3 breast cancer, five months into her pregnancy. In talking with her husband, I pleaded "Please, just look into this clinic in Mexico... just at least give it some consideration..."
What they choose to do remains to be seen...
My question to you is: What would you do in this situation?
Is the idea of holistic health so far outside of people's rational thinking, that even with a better than 99% success rate, it is turned down in favor of a known path of pain and sickness?
Just wondering out loud...
Conversation With A 2 Year Old...
Life's most precious moments often start out like this...
(sound of crying from the girls' room upstairs)
Me: What's the matter?
2-yr Old: Olivia tol me to way down
Me: Welllll, it is bedtime... you really should lay down and try to go to sleep.
2-yr Old: But I need a dwink, Daddy!
We go downstairs and fill up a cup of water for her, which she drinks about two swallows from
Me: Okay, let's go to bed...
2-yr Old: I need thtuffy-nose medicine...
Me: (groan) All right... pouring some allergy medicine for her. Drink it up. While she is drinking up her medicine, I pull out the box of band-aids and proceed to clean up many of the cuts and scratches I had gotten from fixing the garage door earlier that evening
Me: Where is the Neosporin?! I ransack the medicine cabinet, while my daughter opens the box of band-aids and unwraps a bunch of them for me. I find the ointment, but end up sticking the first band-aid together and tearing it...
2-yr Old: Oh, tartar sauce...
I get all of the band-aids put into place...
Me: Okay, you really need to go to bed now...
2-yr Old: I need to go potty!
Me: (groan) Okay...
She goes potty...
Me: Okay, Sweetie... let's go to bed!
2-yr Old: I need bwush my teef!
She brushes her teeth
Me: Okay... NOW let's go to bed...
2-yr Old: I need go check on Mommy...
Me: I see what you're doing... you're just trying to stay up, aren't you?
2-yr Old: (smiling sweetly) Can I stay up?
(sound of crying from the girls' room upstairs)
Me: What's the matter?
2-yr Old: Olivia tol me to way down
Me: Welllll, it is bedtime... you really should lay down and try to go to sleep.
2-yr Old: But I need a dwink, Daddy!
We go downstairs and fill up a cup of water for her, which she drinks about two swallows from
Me: Okay, let's go to bed...
2-yr Old: I need thtuffy-nose medicine...
Me: (groan) All right... pouring some allergy medicine for her. Drink it up. While she is drinking up her medicine, I pull out the box of band-aids and proceed to clean up many of the cuts and scratches I had gotten from fixing the garage door earlier that evening
Me: Where is the Neosporin?! I ransack the medicine cabinet, while my daughter opens the box of band-aids and unwraps a bunch of them for me. I find the ointment, but end up sticking the first band-aid together and tearing it...
2-yr Old: Oh, tartar sauce...
I get all of the band-aids put into place...
Me: Okay, you really need to go to bed now...
2-yr Old: I need to go potty!
Me: (groan) Okay...
She goes potty...
Me: Okay, Sweetie... let's go to bed!
2-yr Old: I need bwush my teef!
She brushes her teeth
Me: Okay... NOW let's go to bed...
2-yr Old: I need go check on Mommy...
Me: I see what you're doing... you're just trying to stay up, aren't you?
2-yr Old: (smiling sweetly) Can I stay up?
Sunday, May 21, 2006
V.O.D. Strikes Again
How appropriate a nickname for yours truly:
I don't really know what to say.
Vortex of Death
It seems as though one of our best friends, currently residing in Phoenix, Arizona... currently 5 months pregnant... has been diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer, and has been given a 48% chance of survival by her doctors.I don't really know what to say.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Moving Down The Freeway Of Life
Over the past year, as I have traveled approximately 50 miles to work each morning, and then back home again, I have become pretty familiar with the route.
I know which places tend to bog down first with rush hour traffic, I know where the police usually like to sit and watch for speeders. I know where the accidents typically happen, and I know which lanes are best to be in at certain points of the road.
Example: About a mile before a certain freeway exit, it's a good idea to move from lane 1 or 2 over to lane 3, because invariably, lanes 1 and 2 get bogged down at that point. However, you're wise to move back into lane 1 just as you get to that exit, because traffic from the onramp will bog down lanes 3 and 4 almost immediately as you pass under the bridge.
I'm going to liken this freeway to my lifestyle... Lane number 1 (the far left lane) representing the left... or liberal... side of things. Lane number 4 (the far right lane) representing the right... or conservative... side of things.
I am a social moderate, who typically hangs out in lanes 2 & 3 Getting too far in either direction hasn't ever proved productive for me. The far right lane is usually clogged with the slow and cautious drivers, who could easily represent the slow and cautious people in society who impede progess and change. The far left lane is where the Mario Andretti wannabe's hang out, those in real life who are all about progress and change, but far less cautious than their slow-lane counterparts. While the rest of the freeway moves at a steady pace during rush hour, the left lane is characteristically "stop & go"... People who need to go faster, need to stop faster... and remain at a dead stop longer than any other lane.
And while many people think that it's the fast and progressive ones that the cause of most accidents and harm on the road, there is surprisingly a near-equal amount of responsibilty to be doled out to the slow drivers who impede the flow of traffic, exactly obeying the posted speed limit when the flow of traffic is much higher. And then there are those who weave in and out of lanes and ideaologies at a high rate of speed, recklessly affecting the journey of many others, and whose only thought is for themselves, and how they can get ahead of everyone else. These usually make the best politicians.
I am certainly all about compassion, and am quick to donate money (if I have it) to helping other people, whether it be in a third-world country, or parts of our own country where mother nature has wreaked a bit of havoc, or even the occasional down and out person standing on the side of the road with a cardboard sign. Third-world debt reduction? I'm all about that too... if done wisely. In these and many other ways, I identify with the fast-lane liberals.
There are ways that I align myself with the cautious slow-lane conservatives as well: I'm all about border security, especially when you have multiple reports of "OTM's" (Other than Mexicans) coming across the southern borders... especially when they're identified as being of Arabic descent. I mean, how many Mexican Arabs do we have that are dying to get into the "Great Satanic Nation" for good reasons? Anyone? Anyone?
Set the wayback machine for the infamous 11th of September, 2001. The terrorist acts that brought down two manhattan skyscrapers and destroyed a section of our military's central strategic center were perpetrated by people living inside the U.S. at the time. It's a lot easier to plan and execute acts of terrorism if you're on the inside, and can observe, and "case the joint", so to speak.
This is also where I'm fine with the government analyzing data from phone records and looking for patterns. Kingfisher threw out a scenario on a previous post where this data could possibly be used against you, and he has a valid point. However, if the government looking at phone records and identifying patterns ends up netting some terrorists and stopping some horrific acts, and saving lives, then - to me, at least - it's worth it. Especially if the lives saved includes a loved one.
And then there's the whole argument of "rights". Somehow, if you were to magically transport the country's founding fathers to any one of the several mosques in America where "firebrand" imams preach violence against the infidel, and openly support terrorist acts against America, I believe they would find it hard to label that simply as "free speech". Until just 30 to 40 years ago, this kind of behavior was labeled as "treason". I believe the right to privacy ends when it affects the safety and well-being of others. Consider this: If certain evidences pointed to a meth lab being just a few houses away, would you be more concerned about the safety of yourself and those around you, or the privacy of the guy living with the meth lab?
There is a lot of concern that the current administration of this nation isn't trustworthy; that their actions and intent are nothing but deceptive and nefarious at best. My response to that is: Maybe you're right. But then again, maybe you're not. There is such partisan bickering, such widespread slander, villification and defamation flooding through the political world that Jesus himself could be president, and you wouldn't know whether you could trust him or not. There is a point, though, when it comes down to "Do you put your trust in the hungry jaguars that are chasing you through the jungle, or the rickety-looking rope bridge that might get you across the chasm and to safety?"
So my advice for driving on the freeway of life: Drive a little bit in every lane. The more you drive the road, the more you'll develop a feel for how it flows, how the traffic moves around you. You'll discover which points clog up quickly, and which points open up to endless vistas of beautiful scenery. Drive a little in each lane, and get to know what traffic is like for other drivers... see the road from behind their windshield a few times. Be a little bit liberal and progressive, be a little bit cautious and conservative, and spend some time in between. Variety is the spice of life, and as the good book says "To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven"
I know which places tend to bog down first with rush hour traffic, I know where the police usually like to sit and watch for speeders. I know where the accidents typically happen, and I know which lanes are best to be in at certain points of the road.
Example: About a mile before a certain freeway exit, it's a good idea to move from lane 1 or 2 over to lane 3, because invariably, lanes 1 and 2 get bogged down at that point. However, you're wise to move back into lane 1 just as you get to that exit, because traffic from the onramp will bog down lanes 3 and 4 almost immediately as you pass under the bridge.
I'm going to liken this freeway to my lifestyle... Lane number 1 (the far left lane) representing the left... or liberal... side of things. Lane number 4 (the far right lane) representing the right... or conservative... side of things.
I am a social moderate, who typically hangs out in lanes 2 & 3 Getting too far in either direction hasn't ever proved productive for me. The far right lane is usually clogged with the slow and cautious drivers, who could easily represent the slow and cautious people in society who impede progess and change. The far left lane is where the Mario Andretti wannabe's hang out, those in real life who are all about progress and change, but far less cautious than their slow-lane counterparts. While the rest of the freeway moves at a steady pace during rush hour, the left lane is characteristically "stop & go"... People who need to go faster, need to stop faster... and remain at a dead stop longer than any other lane.
And while many people think that it's the fast and progressive ones that the cause of most accidents and harm on the road, there is surprisingly a near-equal amount of responsibilty to be doled out to the slow drivers who impede the flow of traffic, exactly obeying the posted speed limit when the flow of traffic is much higher. And then there are those who weave in and out of lanes and ideaologies at a high rate of speed, recklessly affecting the journey of many others, and whose only thought is for themselves, and how they can get ahead of everyone else. These usually make the best politicians.
I am certainly all about compassion, and am quick to donate money (if I have it) to helping other people, whether it be in a third-world country, or parts of our own country where mother nature has wreaked a bit of havoc, or even the occasional down and out person standing on the side of the road with a cardboard sign. Third-world debt reduction? I'm all about that too... if done wisely. In these and many other ways, I identify with the fast-lane liberals.
There are ways that I align myself with the cautious slow-lane conservatives as well: I'm all about border security, especially when you have multiple reports of "OTM's" (Other than Mexicans) coming across the southern borders... especially when they're identified as being of Arabic descent. I mean, how many Mexican Arabs do we have that are dying to get into the "Great Satanic Nation" for good reasons? Anyone? Anyone?
Set the wayback machine for the infamous 11th of September, 2001. The terrorist acts that brought down two manhattan skyscrapers and destroyed a section of our military's central strategic center were perpetrated by people living inside the U.S. at the time. It's a lot easier to plan and execute acts of terrorism if you're on the inside, and can observe, and "case the joint", so to speak.
This is also where I'm fine with the government analyzing data from phone records and looking for patterns. Kingfisher threw out a scenario on a previous post where this data could possibly be used against you, and he has a valid point. However, if the government looking at phone records and identifying patterns ends up netting some terrorists and stopping some horrific acts, and saving lives, then - to me, at least - it's worth it. Especially if the lives saved includes a loved one.
And then there's the whole argument of "rights". Somehow, if you were to magically transport the country's founding fathers to any one of the several mosques in America where "firebrand" imams preach violence against the infidel, and openly support terrorist acts against America, I believe they would find it hard to label that simply as "free speech". Until just 30 to 40 years ago, this kind of behavior was labeled as "treason". I believe the right to privacy ends when it affects the safety and well-being of others. Consider this: If certain evidences pointed to a meth lab being just a few houses away, would you be more concerned about the safety of yourself and those around you, or the privacy of the guy living with the meth lab?
There is a lot of concern that the current administration of this nation isn't trustworthy; that their actions and intent are nothing but deceptive and nefarious at best. My response to that is: Maybe you're right. But then again, maybe you're not. There is such partisan bickering, such widespread slander, villification and defamation flooding through the political world that Jesus himself could be president, and you wouldn't know whether you could trust him or not. There is a point, though, when it comes down to "Do you put your trust in the hungry jaguars that are chasing you through the jungle, or the rickety-looking rope bridge that might get you across the chasm and to safety?"
So my advice for driving on the freeway of life: Drive a little bit in every lane. The more you drive the road, the more you'll develop a feel for how it flows, how the traffic moves around you. You'll discover which points clog up quickly, and which points open up to endless vistas of beautiful scenery. Drive a little in each lane, and get to know what traffic is like for other drivers... see the road from behind their windshield a few times. Be a little bit liberal and progressive, be a little bit cautious and conservative, and spend some time in between. Variety is the spice of life, and as the good book says "To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven"
Friday, May 12, 2006
A Few Awards...
A corny cornucopia of awards to hand out...
Has anyone here seen the TV show Numbers? They use mathematic equations to reveal patterns in calling, especially international calls. If consistent patterns of communication show up between suspected terrorists and people living within the US, then those people are investigated a little more closely.
Unless you're calling the Middle East on a regular basis, and talking for quite a while, I certainly wouldn't worry about the government collecting this data from the phone companies. You don't cripple the guard dog who watches over you...
That's all for now... maybe more later.
Cheapass of the Day Award
I pulled into a gas station just down the road from my office to buy a diet soda this morning, and saw a guy washing his entire car with the windshield squeegee.Strange Cosmic Fact of the Day Award
Remember the head-on double fatal accident I posted about? Since that time, two other head-on collisions have happened in the same location. The more recent accidents have left the drivers critically injured, but not dead. And the freeway, of course, was shut down each time, creating huge traffic congestion problems. You think that the highway patrol would put up a large sign or something that said "Don't crash here, dammit!"Obscure Fact About Me Award
Yes, In high school I was a band geek. I have photographic proof which I will insert into this post later tonight. I played the trumpet, and could play the sax, flute and drums a bit, too. Our school started a marching band the summer I graduated, and I played in it. We took "First in State" at the July 24th (state holiday) parade in Salt Lake. I'm currently in the slow and lengthy process of teaching myself piano.Much Ado About Nothing Award
This whole "furor" over the government and phone records. The anthill that is truly becoming a mountain. I mean, Hello, People! They're not recording phone calls... they couldn't give a damn less about Aunt Mabel's secret cake recipes, or your teenage daughter's extensive social life, your brother's illegal music downloading, the gossip about the neighbors, or the affair you've been having with the school crossing guard... What they are getting from the phone companies is data. Data that includes the date and time of the telephone call, the origin and destination of the call, as well as the length of the call.Has anyone here seen the TV show Numbers? They use mathematic equations to reveal patterns in calling, especially international calls. If consistent patterns of communication show up between suspected terrorists and people living within the US, then those people are investigated a little more closely.
Unless you're calling the Middle East on a regular basis, and talking for quite a while, I certainly wouldn't worry about the government collecting this data from the phone companies. You don't cripple the guard dog who watches over you...
This Musician Kicks Ass Award
I had heard about Matthew Good from Countess's site, but had never heard his music. I got a hold of his CD "Avalanche" two days ago, and listened.... Ah, I Love it! This guy is great! I'm listening to him right now...So Sad It's Funny Award
Ticket Sales to Mission Impossible III haven't been going as well as projected, and so friends of Tom Cruise from the Church of Scientology Celebrity Center in the Hollywood / Bel Air area have been pitchin' in to help their buddy out, by buying up literally hundreds of movie tickets apiece, and giving them away in an effort to boost box office numbers. I can't help but laugh. I'm sorry... *snort*That's all for now... maybe more later.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Audience Participation Requested
In an attempt to inject some levity and fun into a recently morose blog, I'm asking for a bit of participation here's
At the end of the day, I will go through the comments, and cut and paste the moments and quotes into the body of the post, for easier reading. Once your comments have been added to the post, they'll be deleted from the comments section.
I'll start off, and then the floor is yours...
Nilo The Shadow: Where you see the sailor falling off of the Empire State Building in the background, bouncing off the building as he goes.
Nilo The Holy Grail: Pretty much the whole damn movie.
Sleepless Mama Serenity:
Kaylee: It's going on a year I haven't had anything 'twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!
Captain Mal: ...God, I can't know that!
Jayne: I could stand to hear a little more.
Sleepless Mama Tortilla Soup:
Dad: As long as you live under my roof you'll obey my rules!
Maribel: Fine! That's fine! (pause) Because I'm moving in with Andy!
Dad: What?
Andy:(equally surprised) What?
Shelly National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: pretty much the whole movie, but specifically the cat electrocution and Chevy Chase's "When Santa comes down the chimney he's gonna find the happiest bunch of assholes this side of the loony bin" speech. My hubby and I make a date to watch that movie every Christmas - no kids allowed!
Shelly Sideways: The look on Paul Giamatti's face as he's crawling through the house to get Thomas Hayden Church's wallet and realizes what's going on in the bedroom.
Shelly Goldmember: The *entire* film. Hilarious.
Shelly Steel Magnolias: way too many great lines to count. "Thanks, Ouiser - nothing like a good piece of ass." "Here, hit her! You can print up shirts - I slapped Ouiser Boudreaux" "This is it, I have found it - I am in Hell." "I'm not crazy, M'Lynn - I've just been in a very bad mood for the last 40 years." That is one of my all-time favorite movies.
Harry: It's not because it's New Year's Eve, and it's not because I'm lonely. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to begin as soon as possible.
Shelly The Order: There was a great line in a Heath Ledger film that I think was called The Order. "It's you and me until the wheels fall off." I like that sentiment.
Sleepless Mama The Patriot: The colonials who were retreating seeing the American flag go forward, then turning around and following it.
Shelly A Christmas Carol: The George C. Scott version is the *only* version. (He shared my birthday, btw.)
Sleepless Mama Radio: The whole movie. Seriously, I could only watch it one time, because I cried the whole. Way. Through.
Shelly Steel Magnolias: I never lose it until Sally Field's "I can run a marathon but my daughter can't" speech, but I've never made it through that scene without crying.
Shelly Pretty Woman: The line that always got me in this one was Hector Elizondo's "It must be difficult letting go of something so beautiful."
Sleepless Mama Lethal Weapon I-IV: Because I can't get enough of Mel Gibson kicking ass and taking names. Also, because Rene Russo gets to kick ass, and I think we need more female asskickers in Hollywood.
Sleepless Mama V For Vendetta: When Parliament is blown up, but also when the citizens gather and beat the living crap out of a Fingerman who shot a child. Pretty much all the civil disobedience. Power to the people! Bitches!
Sleepless Mama Blood In, Blood Out: Bound by Honor: One of the cholos being chased says, in this relaxed way, to his fellow cholos (in Spanish) "Tighten your balls."
Sleepless Mama Speed: The whole movie was one long car chase/gunfight.
Sleepless Mama The Royal Tenebaums: Pretty much the whole Luke-Wilson-is-in-love-with-his-sister-and-never-grew-out-of-it. But especially when they kiss. Excuse me, but ew.
Sleepless Mama The Matrix: Yeah, I know, it's passe now, but when it first came out, it blew my mind.
Shelly Frailty: There are several points in the movie where you can see what's coming, but it's shocking and you're not sure you want to see it. Truly disturbing movie.
Nilo Pitch Black: The woman getting torn in half by the bird creatures.
Sleepless Mama Wild Things: Pretty much all the sex parts. Also the part when Neve Campbell rips out her own teeth. My incisors hurt just thinking about it!
Shelly Payback: The entire movie. That thing sucked.
Shelly Carlito's Way: Al Pacino's love scene - great actor, but ick.
Movie Moments
I want you to list some of your favorite movie moments out, using either the categories below, or some of your own. List out as many or few as you want, using as many or few of the categories as you want.At the end of the day, I will go through the comments, and cut and paste the moments and quotes into the body of the post, for easier reading. Once your comments have been added to the post, they'll be deleted from the comments section.
- Favorite funny moments
- Favorite romantic moments
- Favorite awe-inspiring moments
- Favorite tear-jerking moments
- Favorite action moments
- Favorite "yeah! right on!" moments
- Favorite edge of your seat moments
- Favorite car chase / gunfight moments
- Favorite scary moments
- Favorite mind-bending moments
- Favorite "Damn, I wish I hadn't seen that" moments
I'll start off, and then the floor is yours...
Funny Moments
Nilo Nine Months: Where Hugh Grant and Tom Arnold are beating the hell out of "Arnie the Dinosaur" at the toy store.Nilo The Shadow: Where you see the sailor falling off of the Empire State Building in the background, bouncing off the building as he goes.
Nilo The Holy Grail: Pretty much the whole damn movie.
Sleepless Mama Serenity:
Kaylee: It's going on a year I haven't had anything 'twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!
Captain Mal: ...God, I can't know that!
Jayne: I could stand to hear a little more.
Sleepless Mama Tortilla Soup:
Dad: As long as you live under my roof you'll obey my rules!
Maribel: Fine! That's fine! (pause) Because I'm moving in with Andy!
Dad: What?
Andy:(equally surprised) What?
Shelly National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: pretty much the whole movie, but specifically the cat electrocution and Chevy Chase's "When Santa comes down the chimney he's gonna find the happiest bunch of assholes this side of the loony bin" speech. My hubby and I make a date to watch that movie every Christmas - no kids allowed!
Shelly Sideways: The look on Paul Giamatti's face as he's crawling through the house to get Thomas Hayden Church's wallet and realizes what's going on in the bedroom.
Shelly Goldmember: The *entire* film. Hilarious.
Shelly Steel Magnolias: way too many great lines to count. "Thanks, Ouiser - nothing like a good piece of ass." "Here, hit her! You can print up shirts - I slapped Ouiser Boudreaux" "This is it, I have found it - I am in Hell." "I'm not crazy, M'Lynn - I've just been in a very bad mood for the last 40 years." That is one of my all-time favorite movies.
Romantic Moments
Sleepless Mama When Harry Met Sally:Harry: It's not because it's New Year's Eve, and it's not because I'm lonely. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you want the rest of your life to begin as soon as possible.
Shelly The Order: There was a great line in a Heath Ledger film that I think was called The Order. "It's you and me until the wheels fall off." I like that sentiment.
Awe-Inspiring Moments
Nilo Apollo 13: Launch sequence.Sleepless Mama The Patriot: The colonials who were retreating seeing the American flag go forward, then turning around and following it.
Shelly A Christmas Carol: The George C. Scott version is the *only* version. (He shared my birthday, btw.)
Tear-Jerking Moments
Nilo Charly: Where Charly's grandma removes her shoes from her feet as she approaches Charly's casket during the viewing.Sleepless Mama Radio: The whole movie. Seriously, I could only watch it one time, because I cried the whole. Way. Through.
Shelly Steel Magnolias: I never lose it until Sally Field's "I can run a marathon but my daughter can't" speech, but I've never made it through that scene without crying.
Shelly Pretty Woman: The line that always got me in this one was Hector Elizondo's "It must be difficult letting go of something so beautiful."
Action Moments
Sleepless Mama Serenity: River, kicking all that Reaver ass, all by herself.Sleepless Mama Lethal Weapon I-IV: Because I can't get enough of Mel Gibson kicking ass and taking names. Also, because Rene Russo gets to kick ass, and I think we need more female asskickers in Hollywood.
Yeah! Right On! Moments
Sleepless Mama Terms Of Endearment: Okay, so the mom is in the hospital, all in agony, dying of malignant breast cancer. The grandmother (Shirley MacLain) is telling her grandchildren about the things they'll be able to do when they come back to Houston(!) with her, and how they can do Cub Scouts, etc. The oldest son, age 10ish, who has been a complete and total ass to his mother throughout the movie, says something about his mother being too lazy to check out Cub Scouts. Shirley turns right around and slaps that boy. He starts giving her shit and she slaps him again! Now I certainly don't condone child abuse, and Shirley's character immediately apologizes and explains herself. But seriously, that kid had it coming. I'd expect to get slapped for talking trash about my mom when she's laid up in the hospital.Sleepless Mama V For Vendetta: When Parliament is blown up, but also when the citizens gather and beat the living crap out of a Fingerman who shot a child. Pretty much all the civil disobedience. Power to the people! Bitches!
Edge-of-your-seat Moments
Nilo Aliens: The whole freakin' movieSleepless Mama Blood In, Blood Out: Bound by Honor: One of the cholos being chased says, in this relaxed way, to his fellow cholos (in Spanish) "Tighten your balls."
Sleepless Mama Speed: The whole movie was one long car chase/gunfight.
Scary Moments
Nilo Jurassic Park: The raptor jumping at Laura Dern in the utility vault... The lady next to my friend screamed and slapped her hand down on his knee, making him jump and scream as well...Mind-Bending Moments
Nilo The Sixth Sense: The ending, of course.Sleepless Mama The Royal Tenebaums: Pretty much the whole Luke-Wilson-is-in-love-with-his-sister-and-never-grew-out-of-it. But especially when they kiss. Excuse me, but ew.
Sleepless Mama The Matrix: Yeah, I know, it's passe now, but when it first came out, it blew my mind.
Shelly Frailty: There are several points in the movie where you can see what's coming, but it's shocking and you're not sure you want to see it. Truly disturbing movie.
"Wish I Hadn't Seen That" Moments
Nilo The Crying Game: The "big surprise" scene.Nilo Pitch Black: The woman getting torn in half by the bird creatures.
Sleepless Mama Wild Things: Pretty much all the sex parts. Also the part when Neve Campbell rips out her own teeth. My incisors hurt just thinking about it!
Shelly Payback: The entire movie. That thing sucked.
Shelly Carlito's Way: Al Pacino's love scene - great actor, but ick.
Monday, May 8, 2006
"I'll take what's behind the blue tarp, Alex..."
Surprise! But not the kind you enjoy.
Last Saturday morning, some neighbors were taking a walk down one of the main roads in our area, and were passing by this house.
The yard used to be immaculate and gorgeous. We would comment on it whenever we'd take the dog out for a walk. But lately, the whole thing has gone to pot. Weeds growing out of control, and the whole place looks like it has just fallen into a general state of neglect.
Then there was the blue tarp over the garage door. It looked as if the door was broken, and that the blue tarp was the only way the owner could cover his garage. But the tarp stayed there... seemingly forever. If the neglected state of the yard didn't say "white trash", then certainly, the tarp did.
So, the neighbors who were out on a walk were getting pretty disgusted with this place, and were about ready to report the owner to the homeowner's association when the husband gets an idea.
"I'm gonna go peek under the tarp", says the husband.
"No you are not!, says the wife.
The husband walks up the driveway and peers behind the tarp, expecting perhaps to find several bales of marijuana, or maybe a meth lab. What he did find, however, will haunt him for quite a while.
The owner of the house was sitting in a chair in the garage. Dead. He had shot himself in the head.
The husband freaks out, calls the cops, and then calls another friend to wait there with him. So, a few minutes later when I drive by with all of my kids, half of the street is cordoned off, and four police cars are sitting in front of the house with their lights flashing.
The initial forensics report indicated that he has been dead for roughly a month. Dead. Sitting behind that tarp every time we walked by with the dog.
Apparently, the man had no family or friends in the area... no one to miss him when he died.
How completely tragic...
Last Saturday morning, some neighbors were taking a walk down one of the main roads in our area, and were passing by this house.
The yard used to be immaculate and gorgeous. We would comment on it whenever we'd take the dog out for a walk. But lately, the whole thing has gone to pot. Weeds growing out of control, and the whole place looks like it has just fallen into a general state of neglect.
Then there was the blue tarp over the garage door. It looked as if the door was broken, and that the blue tarp was the only way the owner could cover his garage. But the tarp stayed there... seemingly forever. If the neglected state of the yard didn't say "white trash", then certainly, the tarp did.
So, the neighbors who were out on a walk were getting pretty disgusted with this place, and were about ready to report the owner to the homeowner's association when the husband gets an idea.
"I'm gonna go peek under the tarp", says the husband.
"No you are not!, says the wife.
The husband walks up the driveway and peers behind the tarp, expecting perhaps to find several bales of marijuana, or maybe a meth lab. What he did find, however, will haunt him for quite a while.
The owner of the house was sitting in a chair in the garage. Dead. He had shot himself in the head.
The husband freaks out, calls the cops, and then calls another friend to wait there with him. So, a few minutes later when I drive by with all of my kids, half of the street is cordoned off, and four police cars are sitting in front of the house with their lights flashing.
The initial forensics report indicated that he has been dead for roughly a month. Dead. Sitting behind that tarp every time we walked by with the dog.
Apparently, the man had no family or friends in the area... no one to miss him when he died.
How completely tragic...
How to Dismantle an Atomic Blog*
First off, my apologies to anyone who had the expectation of reading anything new on this blog last week... It was a very, very busy week. It didn't help that I had to work on a project for EFH**, which in and of itself is highly stressful, and destroys any literary creativity that I might have.
That being said, let's review the steps for dismantling this atomic blog*:
- Finish unfinished business; namely the European Trip entry. I've asked my best friend three times now for any memories he might have from the trip, and so far I've gotten nothing back from him... So, I'll wing it.
- Archive all of my past entries into either html, pdf or Microsoft Word. I do want to have a record of this little venture, if only for myself...
- Say anything and everything that I need to say... Anything I need to get off my chest before I pull the plug. Some fun, some serious...
- Have even more fun with the masthead pics and Blogger settings that I haven't messed around with that much. It's like working in a nuclear* power plant, and always wanting to push that red button... well now, I get to.
- Send out invitations to the blog funeral. And yes, there will be a last will & testament... although I really don't have anything to bequeath. It'll be more like "last words."
I really thought it would be hard to leave this blogging thing all behind, but if last week was any indication of the future, I think I'll be doing alright. That, and I'm seriously considering applying for a new job that is a two year contract, and making 50% more than I am here. Plus amazing benefits. Big downside? Not having internet access throughout the day... I'm seriously weighing it; this could be a way to get into a larger house, save up a little money for school, and get that kickass camera I've been lusting after.
Have a very happy Monday, one and all!
*Any similarities between "atomic", "nuclear" and this blog are highly coincidental, and at best, fictional. This site is about as low-voltage as you can get.
**The Engineer From Hell
Monday, May 1, 2006
Monday Morning Double-Take
You might be re-thinkin' the whole pizza delivery thing after you follow this link:
This is just wrong on so many different levels...
This is a study in irony. She wasn't driving a '58 Plymouth Fury named "Christine" was she?
This is what people do when they have wayyyyyyyy too much time on their hands...
I hope you are all having a wonderful Monday; I've been in my office since 4:15am, and am looking forward to heading home around lunch time today! Cheers!
This is just wrong on so many different levels...
This is a study in irony. She wasn't driving a '58 Plymouth Fury named "Christine" was she?
This is what people do when they have wayyyyyyyy too much time on their hands...
I hope you are all having a wonderful Monday; I've been in my office since 4:15am, and am looking forward to heading home around lunch time today! Cheers!
Friday, April 28, 2006
Oops! I Did It Again...
...Obviously.
It seems as though Britney Spears is again "in the family way".
Disgusting, really... She can barely take care of child one, and now has "Emergency Backup K-FED #2" on the way. And what kind of name is "K-FED", anyway? It reminds me of:get into Britney's pants rise to the top like a floatie in the sceptic tank, er, rise to heights that defy expectations...
I can't seem to say anything nice about them this morning... Man, I am gonna miss being able to be snarky, and having an audience of at least one and a half people to listen to me...
My Luck, Again...
How is it that birds always seem to know when you've washed your car? Is it wrong of me to hope that the Lexus from the car wash yesterday has met with a similar fate? A flock of incontinent seagulls, perhaps?
Numerology
I followed a link to a numerology site yesterday for a free reading. They take your full name and birthdate, and then send you back a description of your character traits within about twenty minutes. It was uncanny how many things they nailed right on the nose. Very uncanny.
Try It: www.123numerology.com
I thought I had more than that for today... but I don't. Have a spectacular weekend!!
It seems as though Britney Spears is again "in the family way".
Disgusting, really... She can barely take care of child one, and now has "Emergency Backup K-FED #2" on the way. And what kind of name is "K-FED", anyway? It reminds me of:
- A now-defunct record company (K-TEL)
- The Chrysler Car company (K-CAR)
- Dog food (ALPO)...(?)
I can't seem to say anything nice about them this morning... Man, I am gonna miss being able to be snarky, and having an audience of at least one and a half people to listen to me...
My Luck, Again...
How is it that birds always seem to know when you've washed your car? Is it wrong of me to hope that the Lexus from the car wash yesterday has met with a similar fate? A flock of incontinent seagulls, perhaps?
Numerology
I followed a link to a numerology site yesterday for a free reading. They take your full name and birthdate, and then send you back a description of your character traits within about twenty minutes. It was uncanny how many things they nailed right on the nose. Very uncanny.
Try It: www.123numerology.com
I thought I had more than that for today... but I don't. Have a spectacular weekend!!
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Blah Blah...Blah-Blah-Blah...
Just your garden variety of odds & ends...
Today's Cryptoquote:
HB2M... HB2M... HB2.. Meeeeeeee HB2M!
Today's UNCryptoquote:
"Those are years under my belt? I thought they were inches and pounds..."
And Yet Another Example Of My Wonderful Luck:
I decided I'd run my car through the carwash down at the gas station this morning on my way to work. I had a free coupon, and the Blue Mouse was looking rather dirty. I pull up to the carwash entrance, and wouldn't you know it? The Lexus that had just barely pulled in had bought the Super-Duper-Ultra-Deluxe wash that takes about 15 minutes. I couldn't believe it! I halfway expected six guys to jump out of hidden compartments in the carwash and start hand-waxing their car down. I think mine took all of thirty seconds. I told myself I was economizing on water that way...
The Elephant In The Room
Many times throughout the course of this blog, I've ranted about things that are happening in the world that the media just chooses not to cover... and instead, we are bombarded about useless, trivial crap while our world is sinking further and further into... Oh hey, is that the Killers? Oh, I LOVE this song! Yeah!
And there you have it folks, I have A.D.D. ...... And dyslexia. *sigh*
Funeral Plans
I've been working on archiving my posts (starting at the very beginning) into pdf format. Once they're archived, I'll remove them from my site. You'll be able to tell that the end (of my blog, anyway) is near if there aren't any entries left.
Evening Plans
Any of you have any suggestions as to what to have for a birthday dinner?
Today's Cryptoquote:
HB2M... HB2M... HB2.. Meeeeeeee HB2M!
Today's UNCryptoquote:
"Those are years under my belt? I thought they were inches and pounds..."
And Yet Another Example Of My Wonderful Luck:
I decided I'd run my car through the carwash down at the gas station this morning on my way to work. I had a free coupon, and the Blue Mouse was looking rather dirty. I pull up to the carwash entrance, and wouldn't you know it? The Lexus that had just barely pulled in had bought the Super-Duper-Ultra-Deluxe wash that takes about 15 minutes. I couldn't believe it! I halfway expected six guys to jump out of hidden compartments in the carwash and start hand-waxing their car down. I think mine took all of thirty seconds. I told myself I was economizing on water that way...
The Elephant In The Room
Many times throughout the course of this blog, I've ranted about things that are happening in the world that the media just chooses not to cover... and instead, we are bombarded about useless, trivial crap while our world is sinking further and further into... Oh hey, is that the Killers? Oh, I LOVE this song! Yeah!
And there you have it folks, I have A.D.D. ...... And dyslexia. *sigh*
Funeral Plans
I've been working on archiving my posts (starting at the very beginning) into pdf format. Once they're archived, I'll remove them from my site. You'll be able to tell that the end (of my blog, anyway) is near if there aren't any entries left.
Evening Plans
Any of you have any suggestions as to what to have for a birthday dinner?
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Funeral Planning
I like the blue-suede lined casket in the background Must be the "Elvis" model.
I've thought long and hard about this. As much as I have enjoyed blogging, and have immensely enjoyed the friends I have made through my blog, it will soon be time to pull the plug on it.
I think I really put a finger on it the first time the other night when I told a friend "I've been heading in a direction that life didn't want me to go, and now it's yanking back on my leash... hard."
I really need to follow my feelings on this one. The thought of keeping the blog running just adds to the overwhelmingly huge pile of things that I need to get done, whereas closing it down and giving it a decent burial actually gives me a feeling of relief.
I don't really have a date picked out yet... It could be anywhere between now and the end of the summer. When I started, I set goals of
This death won't come completely unannounced... I'll give you fair warning.
More details to follow...
I've thought long and hard about this. As much as I have enjoyed blogging, and have immensely enjoyed the friends I have made through my blog, it will soon be time to pull the plug on it.
I think I really put a finger on it the first time the other night when I told a friend "I've been heading in a direction that life didn't want me to go, and now it's yanking back on my leash... hard."
I really need to follow my feelings on this one. The thought of keeping the blog running just adds to the overwhelmingly huge pile of things that I need to get done, whereas closing it down and giving it a decent burial actually gives me a feeling of relief.
I don't really have a date picked out yet... It could be anywhere between now and the end of the summer. When I started, I set goals of
- Making friends
- Posting at least 200 posts
- Getting at least 10,000 hits on the Stat-Counter.
This death won't come completely unannounced... I'll give you fair warning.
More details to follow...
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
If I Had A Billion Dollars
A BNL Song comes of age...
As poor Dr. Evil found out, "One Meel-yun Dollars" just doesn't go as far as it used to. So, adjusting for inflation, societal excess, and several other nameless but undoubtedly important factors, I give you the billion dollar version: (And yes, I know that it doesn't really rhyme, but when you have a billion dollars you really don't give a rat's ass)
Well, I'd build me a house - Like a huge chateau or something
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
I'd build a bowling alley in my bathroom - y'know, just because I can
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a Maserati - or maybe a fleet of stretch Hummers
And if I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars
I'd build a golf course in our backyard
If I had a billion dollars
You could help, it wouldn't be that hard
If I had a billion dollars
Maybe we could put like a little tiny lake in there somewhere
You know, we could stock it with swordfish, and alligators and pirhanna, and Shamu! Yes, Shamu... and he could jump out of the water and catch the golf ball in mid-air, and.. and then do a somersault back in the lake...
If I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a tropical island - with a T-Rex and some raptors
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a congressman - yep, like Randy "Duke" Cunningham
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you Mozart's skull - it's on display somewhere in a museum
And if I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I had a billion dollars
We'd build another one just outside our front door
If I had a billion dollars
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
So we wouldn't... We'd eat "The ultimate PBJ" from Disneyland, and every time we wanted one, we'd fly there in a really cool helicopter, and..and.. land right in front of Space Mountain... yeah!
If I had a billion dollars - If I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a chocolate factory - but not with real oompah-loompah's, that's cruel
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a dog - but not a tiny one like Paris Hilton's
If I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a case of Twinkies - haven't you always wanted a Twinkie?
If I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars, if I had a billion dollars
If I had a billion dollars, if I had a billion dollars
If I had a billion dollars, I'd be targeted by the IRS.
Seriously, If I had a billion dollars...
Give me more suggestions on where to go, and what to see!
As poor Dr. Evil found out, "One Meel-yun Dollars" just doesn't go as far as it used to. So, adjusting for inflation, societal excess, and several other nameless but undoubtedly important factors, I give you the billion dollar version: (And yes, I know that it doesn't really rhyme, but when you have a billion dollars you really don't give a rat's ass)
If I Had A Billion Dollars
If I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollarsWell, I'd build me a house - Like a huge chateau or something
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
I'd build a bowling alley in my bathroom - y'know, just because I can
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a Maserati - or maybe a fleet of stretch Hummers
And if I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars
I'd build a golf course in our backyard
If I had a billion dollars
You could help, it wouldn't be that hard
If I had a billion dollars
Maybe we could put like a little tiny lake in there somewhere
You know, we could stock it with swordfish, and alligators and pirhanna, and Shamu! Yes, Shamu... and he could jump out of the water and catch the golf ball in mid-air, and.. and then do a somersault back in the lake...
If I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a tropical island - with a T-Rex and some raptors
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a congressman - yep, like Randy "Duke" Cunningham
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you Mozart's skull - it's on display somewhere in a museum
And if I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars
We wouldn't have to walk to the store
If I had a billion dollars
We'd build another one just outside our front door
If I had a billion dollars
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
So we wouldn't... We'd eat "The ultimate PBJ" from Disneyland, and every time we wanted one, we'd fly there in a really cool helicopter, and..and.. land right in front of Space Mountain... yeah!
If I had a billion dollars - If I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a chocolate factory - but not with real oompah-loompah's, that's cruel
And if I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a dog - but not a tiny one like Paris Hilton's
If I had a billion dollars - if I had a billion dollars
Well, I'd buy you a case of Twinkies - haven't you always wanted a Twinkie?
If I had a billion dollars I'd buy your love
If I had a billion dollars, if I had a billion dollars
If I had a billion dollars, if I had a billion dollars
If I had a billion dollars, I'd be targeted by the IRS.
Seriously, If I had a billion dollars...
- I'd sponsor like a thousand kids in third world countries
- Quit Job. Screw the two week notice. Go out to lunch. A really good lunch. Go to a movie (Do you know how long it has been since I've seen a movie in a theater?) Hire a nanny with impeccable credentials, book a cruise with my wife to the Mexican Riviera. Buy her a brand-new minivan on the way home... fully loaded.
- Go furniture shopping... for some real good furniture. The kind that costs more money than I make in two months. Realize that furniture will not fit in our present house. Buy a new house. Spend two hours shopping in the sock emporium. (Why? Because I've never shopped for socks. Honest.) Have nothing but large, gooey pecan rolls for lunch. Buy a wave-runner.
- Buy a Nikon D-70 and D-200, along with a new laptop computer. Rent a convertible, turbocharged car and drive to Santa Fe, New Mexico. Just because.
- Visit art museums... buy some stuff for the new house. Take some cool pictures. Go to whatever concert is playing in town that night. Eat dinner at the Tres Hermanos just outside of town. Mmmmm... heavenly!
- Fly to Louisville, KY during Derby Days
- Drive through New England during the fall foliage season
- Go to Disneyworld for a few weeks
- Learn to fly a helicopter and a plane
- Visit the Big Apple
- Buy a ranch in Montana
- Watch a Space Shuttle Launch from Cape Canaveral
- See Hong Kong...
Give me more suggestions on where to go, and what to see!
Friday, April 21, 2006
Mirror, Mirror On The Wall...
Have you ever looked in the mirror, seeing this:
But when you see a picture of yourself, it looks more like this?
They say "The camera adds 10lbs", but I think the camera is pretty selective as to where it puts those pounds.
I guess it depends also on how many cameras are pointed at you, too.
That's today's wierd thought anyway. Hope you all have a marvelous weekend...
But when you see a picture of yourself, it looks more like this?
They say "The camera adds 10lbs", but I think the camera is pretty selective as to where it puts those pounds.
I guess it depends also on how many cameras are pointed at you, too.
That's today's wierd thought anyway. Hope you all have a marvelous weekend...
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Neopolitan 2
Another combination post...
Absolutely amazing. I thought I had it good, spinning out of control on a crowded freeway, and barely hitting one car. These women were involved in an accident where their car was crushed between two semi trucks... and not only did they live to tell about it, but escaped with only some minor cuts and bruises. Abso-frickin-lutely amazing...
*sigh*
I'm one who doesn't like to shop, unless it has to do with computers or home improvement. So far, I'm thinking of a book or two, maybe a DVD... cash... I like cash... One of those "collect all of the quarters from the 50 states" thingys, that way I'll know whether or not to save a quarter or spend it. And a motorcycle. Do you think a motorcycle would be too much to ask for?
Guardian Angels, pt 2
Absolutely amazing. I thought I had it good, spinning out of control on a crowded freeway, and barely hitting one car. These women were involved in an accident where their car was crushed between two semi trucks... and not only did they live to tell about it, but escaped with only some minor cuts and bruises. Abso-frickin-lutely amazing...
Where is your ideal vacation spot?
This is a two part question, folks:- Where is you favorite vacation spot that you have been to?
- Where is your favorite vacation spot that you would like to go to (but haven't yet)?
What to Ask For?
I'm birthday shopping on my breaks. Next week, people will gather at my house, eat cake and ice cream and acknowledge that I have, indeed, aged another year. Inevitably there will be cards, some with money and some not. Some people are chomping at the bit, asking what I'd like for a gift... so... I'm making up a list that I can give to my wife, who can then pass it on to friends and family...*sigh*
I'm one who doesn't like to shop, unless it has to do with computers or home improvement. So far, I'm thinking of a book or two, maybe a DVD... cash... I like cash... One of those "collect all of the quarters from the 50 states" thingys, that way I'll know whether or not to save a quarter or spend it. And a motorcycle. Do you think a motorcycle would be too much to ask for?
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Conversations
My morning in a nutshell
With The Boss
Me: So how was your vacation to Sea World?
Boss: Oh, it was wonderful! The grandkids really had a great time...
Me: Great! Isn't that where one of our engineers went this week?
Boss: Uh, yeah...
Me: Mmmmm... So, does Shamu ever jump out of the water and swallow anyone whole?
Paying the ticket (from the accident two weeks ago)
Cop: Put all of your metal objects into this tray
Me: Wow, this is just like the airport...
Cop: Remove your belt please...
Me: Oh, okay...
Cop: Your fly's down
Me: Aw hell... (zipping up fly)
Cop: Have any coin change?
Me: About a pocket full
Cop: Empty it here...
(Metal detector machine goes off)
Cop: Stand over here, lift your pantlegs up so we can see the tops of your shoes
Me: Do I have to take my dental fillings out?
Cop: Stretch one arm out, then slowly bring your fingertip back and touch your nose...
Me: Whaaa...?
Cop: What is the average annual rainfall for the Amazon Basin?
Me: Ummm....
Cop: Spell "Poseidon" in original greek letters...
Me: Uhh, "Pi"..."Omicron"...
Cop: BACKWARDS!
Me: Oh.....
Cop: Okay, there's just one more test (snapping a latex glove on)
Me: Uh-oh...
My fine was $82.00 Although I can think of plenty of other things that I would like to have spent that on, I am still extremely grateful that I squeaked out of that whole situation intact, and with only a scratch on the bumper. If 82 clams was the price for that blessing, it was handed over without a single regret.
Driving to work after paying the fine, I was treated to an account of radio host Jimmy Chunga chasing "Twinkie the Kid" down the road. Being that Chunga is about six-foot five inches, he has often dressed in mascot costumes for different schools and companies.
One day, while driving down North Temple street in Salt Lake, he spies "Twinkie the Kid" standing out in front of the Wonder Bread store, waving to the passers-by. Something inside of him snapped, he pulled his car over, jumped out and started racing toward Twinkie.
Fortunately, our large yellow spongecake becomes wise to what's happening, and takes off at top speed down the sidewalk. The footchase lasts for a few minutes, and Twinkie gets away, but not without losing his foam rubber cowboy hat.
"All I wanted to do was just tackle him", says Chunga. "Then I would have gotten back into my car and driven away..."
A short time later, Chunga was seen pommeling "Charlie the Chocolate-Chip Pancake" in front of IHOP...
This man is my hero. I was laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe...
With The Boss
Me: So how was your vacation to Sea World?
Boss: Oh, it was wonderful! The grandkids really had a great time...
Me: Great! Isn't that where one of our engineers went this week?
Boss: Uh, yeah...
Me: Mmmmm... So, does Shamu ever jump out of the water and swallow anyone whole?
Paying the ticket (from the accident two weeks ago)
Cop: Put all of your metal objects into this tray
Me: Wow, this is just like the airport...
Cop: Remove your belt please...
Me: Oh, okay...
Cop: Your fly's down
Me: Aw hell... (zipping up fly)
Cop: Have any coin change?
Me: About a pocket full
Cop: Empty it here...
(Metal detector machine goes off)
Cop: Stand over here, lift your pantlegs up so we can see the tops of your shoes
Me: Do I have to take my dental fillings out?
Cop: Stretch one arm out, then slowly bring your fingertip back and touch your nose...
Me: Whaaa...?
Cop: What is the average annual rainfall for the Amazon Basin?
Me: Ummm....
Cop: Spell "Poseidon" in original greek letters...
Me: Uhh, "Pi"..."Omicron"...
Cop: BACKWARDS!
Me: Oh.....
Cop: Okay, there's just one more test (snapping a latex glove on)
Me: Uh-oh...
My fine was $82.00 Although I can think of plenty of other things that I would like to have spent that on, I am still extremely grateful that I squeaked out of that whole situation intact, and with only a scratch on the bumper. If 82 clams was the price for that blessing, it was handed over without a single regret.
Driving to work after paying the fine, I was treated to an account of radio host Jimmy Chunga chasing "Twinkie the Kid" down the road. Being that Chunga is about six-foot five inches, he has often dressed in mascot costumes for different schools and companies.
One day, while driving down North Temple street in Salt Lake, he spies "Twinkie the Kid" standing out in front of the Wonder Bread store, waving to the passers-by. Something inside of him snapped, he pulled his car over, jumped out and started racing toward Twinkie.
Fortunately, our large yellow spongecake becomes wise to what's happening, and takes off at top speed down the sidewalk. The footchase lasts for a few minutes, and Twinkie gets away, but not without losing his foam rubber cowboy hat.
"All I wanted to do was just tackle him", says Chunga. "Then I would have gotten back into my car and driven away..."
A short time later, Chunga was seen pommeling "Charlie the Chocolate-Chip Pancake" in front of IHOP...
This man is my hero. I was laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe...
Monday, April 17, 2006
NeoPolitan
Like the ice cream, where you buy one box, yet get three flavors? One post here, three separate directions...
Flavor 1: The Blog
Within the next month or so, I'm going to drop the "No Paige Hemmis Pics Here" name from the blog entirely. It no longer shows up on the masthead, and why use her name? Anytime she makes an appearance on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, I am immediately flooded by people looking for naked pictures of her. It's not really the kind of traffic I look for...
But wait, there's more?
I am toying with the idea of dropping the name Nilo as well. Not sure yet if I will, But I am definitely entertaining the notion...
Flavor 2: Add-on Accesories
What is the strangest selling point you have ever seen for a house or a car? Examples:
There is a possibility that I may not be able to go to chiropractic school, and I do NOT want to continue in my present career. Seeing much of my family this past weekend, I'm impressed by some of the directions they've taken in life:
Let it be said that I will never, ever regret having my kids... They add a dimension to life that enriches you, and makes you so much more a person than you could ever be otherwise.
But I realize that I have tied myself down to my present location and jobs because of my need to provide for them. Presently, I work in a windowless office, doing work that will rarely, if ever, be appreciated. I want to change that.
I love working with people, seeing different situations and (if possible) different scenery each day, and I love being able to solve problems.
I am asking for suggestions for an alternative career if Chiropractic school doesn't work out. Feel free to be serious, or keep it light... It doesn't matter. I've come to reflect on the fact that life is TOO. DAMN. SHORT. to be miserable in work or other situations.
The floor is now yours...
Flavor 1: The Blog
Within the next month or so, I'm going to drop the "No Paige Hemmis Pics Here" name from the blog entirely. It no longer shows up on the masthead, and why use her name? Anytime she makes an appearance on Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, I am immediately flooded by people looking for naked pictures of her. It's not really the kind of traffic I look for...
But wait, there's more?
I am toying with the idea of dropping the name Nilo as well. Not sure yet if I will, But I am definitely entertaining the notion...
Flavor 2: Add-on Accesories
What is the strangest selling point you have ever seen for a house or a car? Examples:
- A 2-story garage with a fully functioning hydraulic lift for car repairs...
- Half-sized basketball court in basement
- Secret passageway behind bookcase in library...
- Car has three speeds in reverse...
There is a possibility that I may not be able to go to chiropractic school, and I do NOT want to continue in my present career. Seeing much of my family this past weekend, I'm impressed by some of the directions they've taken in life:
- Stepbrother: Wine broker in San Francisco, CA
- Half-Brother: Part Owner in a snowboard company that is starting to really turn some heads
- Brother-in-law: Up and coming film producer (does amazing work).
- Half-Sister: Ski lift operator
- Stepsister: Manages high-brow beauty salon & boutique.
Let it be said that I will never, ever regret having my kids... They add a dimension to life that enriches you, and makes you so much more a person than you could ever be otherwise.
But I realize that I have tied myself down to my present location and jobs because of my need to provide for them. Presently, I work in a windowless office, doing work that will rarely, if ever, be appreciated. I want to change that.
I love working with people, seeing different situations and (if possible) different scenery each day, and I love being able to solve problems.
I am asking for suggestions for an alternative career if Chiropractic school doesn't work out. Feel free to be serious, or keep it light... It doesn't matter. I've come to reflect on the fact that life is TOO. DAMN. SHORT. to be miserable in work or other situations.
The floor is now yours...
Friday, April 14, 2006
Observances...
I could literally blog for the next ten years on the stuff that goes through my mind while I'm driving to work. But when I sit down to start writing... nothing. Flatline brain scan. And then, inevitably, some engineer (who considers themself the earth's rotational axis) will come barging into my office, roaring about deadlines to be met and how, by damn, their work is so very much more important than anything that I had going.
Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything...
Pensée Une - Somewhere, in an effort to clear the title (No Paige Hemmis Pics Here) off at the top of my blog, I've really farked things up for Firefox users... The header has a buffer, and is offset by what, about 180 pixels or so? It shows up on IE just fine... Maybe some of you with Safari, Opera, Netscape or others can let me know if it's screwed up in those formats as well...
Pensée Deux - Another Nilo movie review: Fun With Dick And Jane (1 1/2 Thumbs Up)
I have mixed feelings on this one... This one's another remake, the first one having come out in the mid-70's. When VCR's first came out, I remember my parents renting "Fun With Dick And Jane", and I immediately fell in love with it. Although it's been a good 25 years since I've seen it, and I don't remember a whole hell of a lot of it, it still rates as a good show in my book.
The remake lacks a few elements that the original had, but throws a couple of creative new ones in there. The first one had an antagonistic unemployment agent that would inevitably discover Dick making a little money under the table, while the remake lacks this character. The remake, however, has the full-bodied acting talents of Jim Carrey and Téa Leoni, and some off-the-wall humorous situations that you just didn't have in the 70's (the dog's shock collar had me laughing for three minutes straight the first time they showed it).
Pensée Trois - Anybody else here tired of the crass commercialization of holidays? I walk into Wal-Mart this morning to get some chips on my way to work, and there are two entire aisles whose tops are lined with these Easter baskets that look like they're three feet tall, have a basketball or soccerball in them, along with a bunch of sugary crap in them... Do people even remember the reason forEaster er, "Spring Holiday"? Strange how any holiday or festival that has anything to do with Christ is being renamed and refocused to something completely commercial... something that draws attention away from its original purpose.
Pensée Quatre - Child Abusers should get the chair (or so says a local DJ). You know what? After listening to what he had to say, I couldn't help but agree with him. Now I know that most kids can drive us to the point where they get a good, hard spank, or even sometimes a slap... I don't necessarily consider this abuse as such. What I consider abuse is hitting, beating, whipping and the such. Essentially, anything that Liza Minelli would do to her husband. And - to be sure - anything of a sexual nature. Anything that would destroy a child's innocence or physically / emotionally scar them throughout their life.
Does the death penalty sound a little harsh? Maybe. But a few heavy-duty child abusers go to the chair or the gas chamber, and all of a sudden you'll have people thinking "maybe beating my child with a stick isn't such a good idea." The whole concept of deterrence is lost on American society as a whole. Examples:
Anyone else see a pattern here?
Lee Ann had an excellent post on the sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona, who does practice deterrence...
Pensée Cinq - Anyone else here just a little uncomfortable that Iran has a) finally enriched uranium and b) that their president has declared that Israel will finally be annihilated? It's one thing to put a civil face on in public and rant insanely in private, but this guy just doesn't give a rat's ass...
Pensée Six - What do you guys think of the alarming proliferation of "Check cashing" places, and other institutions and programs that prey on people's bad credit / lack of credit? This has been on my mind lately, as one of these places has opened up pretty close to where I work. And the traffic that it attracts...
That's all for this morning. If anyone has any suggestions about my blog header problem in Firefox, please e-mail me.
Thank You, and have a happySpring Holiday Easter, everyone!
Not that I'm speaking from experience or anything...
Pensée Une - Somewhere, in an effort to clear the title (No Paige Hemmis Pics Here) off at the top of my blog, I've really farked things up for Firefox users... The header has a buffer, and is offset by what, about 180 pixels or so? It shows up on IE just fine... Maybe some of you with Safari, Opera, Netscape or others can let me know if it's screwed up in those formats as well...
Pensée Deux - Another Nilo movie review: Fun With Dick And Jane (1 1/2 Thumbs Up)
I have mixed feelings on this one... This one's another remake, the first one having come out in the mid-70's. When VCR's first came out, I remember my parents renting "Fun With Dick And Jane", and I immediately fell in love with it. Although it's been a good 25 years since I've seen it, and I don't remember a whole hell of a lot of it, it still rates as a good show in my book.
The remake lacks a few elements that the original had, but throws a couple of creative new ones in there. The first one had an antagonistic unemployment agent that would inevitably discover Dick making a little money under the table, while the remake lacks this character. The remake, however, has the full-bodied acting talents of Jim Carrey and Téa Leoni, and some off-the-wall humorous situations that you just didn't have in the 70's (the dog's shock collar had me laughing for three minutes straight the first time they showed it).
Pensée Trois - Anybody else here tired of the crass commercialization of holidays? I walk into Wal-Mart this morning to get some chips on my way to work, and there are two entire aisles whose tops are lined with these Easter baskets that look like they're three feet tall, have a basketball or soccerball in them, along with a bunch of sugary crap in them... Do people even remember the reason for
Pensée Quatre - Child Abusers should get the chair (or so says a local DJ). You know what? After listening to what he had to say, I couldn't help but agree with him. Now I know that most kids can drive us to the point where they get a good, hard spank, or even sometimes a slap... I don't necessarily consider this abuse as such. What I consider abuse is hitting, beating, whipping and the such. Essentially, anything that Liza Minelli would do to her husband. And - to be sure - anything of a sexual nature. Anything that would destroy a child's innocence or physically / emotionally scar them throughout their life.
Does the death penalty sound a little harsh? Maybe. But a few heavy-duty child abusers go to the chair or the gas chamber, and all of a sudden you'll have people thinking "maybe beating my child with a stick isn't such a good idea." The whole concept of deterrence is lost on American society as a whole. Examples:
- Deterrent for Iraqi or Afghani "insurgents" being caught by the U.S.: All expense paid vacation to American resort "Gitmo", where you have gourmet food that satisfies your religious dietary requirements, climate control, a copy of your scriptures, an arrow painted on the floor telling you which way to face when you say your daily prayers...
- Deterrent for raping a child repeatedly over a four year period: Sixty days in jail, followed by rehabilitation and counseling.
- Deterrent for embezzling millions of dollars from your company: An all-expense paid vacation to "Club Fed"
- Deterrent for being the Taliban spokeperson: Admission into the prestigious Yale University.
- Deterrence for striking a Capitol police officer as you pass through a security checkpoint with no credentials: Who knows? Maybe a good "racial profiling" lawsuit... certainly lots of free publicity.
- Deterrent for capturing American citizens in Iraq, holding them hostage or beheading them in front of the camera: All the free publicity the American media can muster.
Anyone else see a pattern here?
Lee Ann had an excellent post on the sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona, who does practice deterrence...
Pensée Cinq - Anyone else here just a little uncomfortable that Iran has a) finally enriched uranium and b) that their president has declared that Israel will finally be annihilated? It's one thing to put a civil face on in public and rant insanely in private, but this guy just doesn't give a rat's ass...
Pensée Six - What do you guys think of the alarming proliferation of "Check cashing" places, and other institutions and programs that prey on people's bad credit / lack of credit? This has been on my mind lately, as one of these places has opened up pretty close to where I work. And the traffic that it attracts...
That's all for this morning. If anyone has any suggestions about my blog header problem in Firefox, please e-mail me.
Thank You, and have a happy
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Hollywierd parts the Red Sea...
...or "Bad-Ass Moses".
Did anyone catch the remake of "The Ten Commandments"on ABC-TV over the past two nights? I did. I'm regretting the time that I spent planted in front of the TV. I could have been doing far more productive things, like doing dishes, building an armoire, making a sandwich, having naughty-bad fun with the wife, etc., etc., etc. So, whether you want it or not, you're getting the "Movie According To Nilo" show today. My apologies to you if you really dug the show...
The Ten Commandments - Two Thumbs Down.
Have you ever fallen victim to a movie that looked pretty good on the commercial, and then you go see it, only to discover that the only 90 seconds of decent footage in the entire film was the commercial?
This is pretty much the case. I enjoyed the scene where Pharoah asks Moses why he should grant freedom to the slaves, and Moses boldly replies "Because God commands it!" I was thinking the whole movie might be of that same caliber. Wrongo.
The movie starts out with an epileptic crazy man prophet sort of fellow that is summoned to interpret a rather disturbing dream of the old Pharoah. He whines like he really, really needs to go to the bathroom, gives his prophetic warning concerning a slave child that will be raised as a prince of Egypt, and then falls over and looks like he's getting jiggy wit'da floor.
In the Cecil B. DeMille version (hereafter referred to as the "CBD" version), Moses doesn't find out about his heritage until he's a grown man (if my memory serves me right). In the stupid-ass version (hereafter referred to as the "SA" version), he is taken as a young child to the ghetto, and introduced to his family. (Hey Moses, these scraggly, stinky people with no fashion sense are your birth family! Don't worry though, you can still live in the palace...)
In the CBD version, Moses and Ramses are raised as brothers. In the SA version, Moses is raised with some Egyptian kid named "Menerith", who later grows up to serve Ramses in his royal court. Menerith has no problem with the fact that Moses comes from slave stock, and years later, brings his son to the ghetto to meet the bedraggled prophet. Son, this is a great man... Ah Menerith, don't you have a plane to catch? Flight 813, maybe?
This version of the Ten Commandments is also infatuated with blood, gore and mindless killing, perpetuating some idiotic notion that the entire pre-renaissance world was just a bloodbath with a few cool buildings, some gnarly costumes here and there, and extremely bad hygiene. Fact shows that many highly civilized peoples have populated the earth in millenia past.
Perhaps the most offensive thing about the show (other than the gross inaccuracies, and very liberal usage of "creative license") was the way they portrayed the man Moses. He continually looked as though he either had a migraine or was constipated. When God "whispered", Moses clutched his head as though the Almighty was standing next to him screaming into a megaphone. Also, the lack of confidence in God, himself and his destiny was another brain-child of Hollywood, who - in the name of "passion" - cuts great and inspirational figures down to the lowest possible denominator, and gives us reason to not only be uninspired, but rather comfortable in our complacency.
Think about it: Moses was educated in the royal courts of Egypt. According to the Bible, The Lord "spake unto Moses face to face, as a man speaketh unto his friend" (Exodus 33:11), and if you read through chapters 3 and 4 of Exodus, the Lord spells things out rather succinctly to Moses, and how events are going to unfold. Contrast this to the SA version, where Moses can't figure out his own identity, let alone God's. Our migraine suffering bedraggled prophet keeps trying to second guess himself and God, wondering what's going to happen next. I'd wager that to be instructed by the Creator of the universe would purge you of any doubt or misgiving... but hey, that's just me.
Again, Yay Charlton Heston, Boo to the new show.
Did anyone catch the remake of "The Ten Commandments"on ABC-TV over the past two nights? I did. I'm regretting the time that I spent planted in front of the TV. I could have been doing far more productive things, like doing dishes, building an armoire, making a sandwich, having naughty-bad fun with the wife, etc., etc., etc. So, whether you want it or not, you're getting the "Movie According To Nilo" show today. My apologies to you if you really dug the show...
The Ten Commandments - Two Thumbs Down.
Have you ever fallen victim to a movie that looked pretty good on the commercial, and then you go see it, only to discover that the only 90 seconds of decent footage in the entire film was the commercial?
This is pretty much the case. I enjoyed the scene where Pharoah asks Moses why he should grant freedom to the slaves, and Moses boldly replies "Because God commands it!" I was thinking the whole movie might be of that same caliber. Wrongo.
The movie starts out with an epileptic crazy man prophet sort of fellow that is summoned to interpret a rather disturbing dream of the old Pharoah. He whines like he really, really needs to go to the bathroom, gives his prophetic warning concerning a slave child that will be raised as a prince of Egypt, and then falls over and looks like he's getting jiggy wit'da floor.
In the Cecil B. DeMille version (hereafter referred to as the "CBD" version), Moses doesn't find out about his heritage until he's a grown man (if my memory serves me right). In the stupid-ass version (hereafter referred to as the "SA" version), he is taken as a young child to the ghetto, and introduced to his family. (Hey Moses, these scraggly, stinky people with no fashion sense are your birth family! Don't worry though, you can still live in the palace...)
In the CBD version, Moses and Ramses are raised as brothers. In the SA version, Moses is raised with some Egyptian kid named "Menerith", who later grows up to serve Ramses in his royal court. Menerith has no problem with the fact that Moses comes from slave stock, and years later, brings his son to the ghetto to meet the bedraggled prophet. Son, this is a great man... Ah Menerith, don't you have a plane to catch? Flight 813, maybe?
This version of the Ten Commandments is also infatuated with blood, gore and mindless killing, perpetuating some idiotic notion that the entire pre-renaissance world was just a bloodbath with a few cool buildings, some gnarly costumes here and there, and extremely bad hygiene. Fact shows that many highly civilized peoples have populated the earth in millenia past.
Perhaps the most offensive thing about the show (other than the gross inaccuracies, and very liberal usage of "creative license") was the way they portrayed the man Moses. He continually looked as though he either had a migraine or was constipated. When God "whispered", Moses clutched his head as though the Almighty was standing next to him screaming into a megaphone. Also, the lack of confidence in God, himself and his destiny was another brain-child of Hollywood, who - in the name of "passion" - cuts great and inspirational figures down to the lowest possible denominator, and gives us reason to not only be uninspired, but rather comfortable in our complacency.
Think about it: Moses was educated in the royal courts of Egypt. According to the Bible, The Lord "spake unto Moses face to face, as a man speaketh unto his friend" (Exodus 33:11), and if you read through chapters 3 and 4 of Exodus, the Lord spells things out rather succinctly to Moses, and how events are going to unfold. Contrast this to the SA version, where Moses can't figure out his own identity, let alone God's. Our migraine suffering bedraggled prophet keeps trying to second guess himself and God, wondering what's going to happen next. I'd wager that to be instructed by the Creator of the universe would purge you of any doubt or misgiving... but hey, that's just me.
Again, Yay Charlton Heston, Boo to the new show.
Monday, April 10, 2006
And Yet Another Stolen Meme...
This one I shamelessly stole from Cinders. I like it because it's just straight "Yes or No" answers... no room for explanation, but plenty for the imagination...
The Rules:
1. You can only say YES or NO!
2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages you and asks!
Taken a picture naked? : YES
Made out with a member of the same sex? : NO
Danced in front of your mirror? : NO
Told a lie? : YES
Gotten in a car with people you just met?: YES
Been in a fist fight? : Yes
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back? : YES
Been arrested? : NO
Left your house without telling your parents? : YES
Ditched school to do something more fun? : YES
Slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? : YES
Seen someone die? : NO
Kissed a picture? : YES
Slept in until 3? : YES
Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? : YES
Played dress up? : YES
Fallen asleep at work/school? : YES
Felt an earthquake? : YES
Touched a snake? : YES
Ran a red light? : YES
Had detention? : YES
Been in a car accident? : YES
Pole danced? : NO
Been lost? : YES
Sang karaoke? : NO
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? : YES
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? : YES
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? : YES
Kissed in the rain? : YES
Sang in the shower? : YES
Got your tongue stuck to a pole? : NO
Ever gone to school partially naked? : NO
Sat on a roof top? : YES
Played chicken? : NO
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? : NO
Been told you're hot by a complete stranger? : YES
Broken a bone? : NO
Mooned/flashed someone? : YES
Forgotten someone's name? : YES
Slept naked? : YES
Blacked out from drinking? : YES
Played a prank on someone? : YES
Felt like killing someone? : YES
Made a parent cry? : YES
Cried over someone? : YES
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? : NO
Had/Have a dog? : YES
Been in a band? : NO
Drank 25 sodas in a day? : NO
Shot a gun? : YES
Again, this is yours for the taking if you want it...
The Rules:
1. You can only say YES or NO!
2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages you and asks!
Taken a picture naked? : YES
Made out with a member of the same sex? : NO
Danced in front of your mirror? : NO
Told a lie? : YES
Gotten in a car with people you just met?: YES
Been in a fist fight? : Yes
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back? : YES
Been arrested? : NO
Left your house without telling your parents? : YES
Ditched school to do something more fun? : YES
Slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? : YES
Seen someone die? : NO
Kissed a picture? : YES
Slept in until 3? : YES
Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? : YES
Played dress up? : YES
Fallen asleep at work/school? : YES
Felt an earthquake? : YES
Touched a snake? : YES
Ran a red light? : YES
Had detention? : YES
Been in a car accident? : YES
Pole danced? : NO
Been lost? : YES
Sang karaoke? : NO
Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? : YES
Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? : YES
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? : YES
Kissed in the rain? : YES
Sang in the shower? : YES
Got your tongue stuck to a pole? : NO
Ever gone to school partially naked? : NO
Sat on a roof top? : YES
Played chicken? : NO
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? : NO
Been told you're hot by a complete stranger? : YES
Broken a bone? : NO
Mooned/flashed someone? : YES
Forgotten someone's name? : YES
Slept naked? : YES
Blacked out from drinking? : YES
Played a prank on someone? : YES
Felt like killing someone? : YES
Made a parent cry? : YES
Cried over someone? : YES
Had sex more than 5 times in one day? : NO
Had/Have a dog? : YES
Been in a band? : NO
Drank 25 sodas in a day? : NO
Shot a gun? : YES
Again, this is yours for the taking if you want it...
Overdue Meme...
Tagged by Lee Ann... Sorry it's taken me so long...
Accent - Utahn, I think. Although I can pull a spanking good British accent, or a damn good red-neck accent if I want.
Booze of choice - Gave up the brew 17 years ago. It's Dr. Pepper or Coke nowadays, usually the "unleaded" variety.
Chore I hate - Dishes
Dog or cat - Dog. She's dumb, but likeable
Essential electronics - Computer... ..?
Favorite perfume(s)/cologne(s) – Old Spice, Old Spice Musk, Oleg Cassini...
Gold or Silver? – Gold
Hometown - Park City, Utah (lived there the longest, anyway)
Insomnia? – Never
Job Title – CAD Designer
Kids? - Four of them... Love 'em more than life.
Living Arrangement - All of us... under one roof.
Most admired trait - Understanding
Number of Sexual Partners - Only my wife.
Overnight Hospital Stays - Not yet
Phobia - I've probably got a few, but I can't think of any right now...
Quote - "I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details." - Albert Einstein
Religion - Yes
Siblings - One brother, one sister, lots of steps and halves in there too (10 sibs total)
Time I wake up - 6:00 am
Unusual talent/skill - Escaping death on the highway
Vegetable I refuse to eat - ? Okra, maybe? I dunno.
Worst habit - Not reading my wife's mind
X-rays - Dental only.
Yummy foods I make - Chicken Salad Croissants, Steak & Cheese in a baguette, Steak, Grilled Turkey & Bacon subs, Bacon Cheeseburgers...
Zodiac sign - Taurus
At this point, I'm supposed to tag 5 of you to pick this up. The floor is open to anyone who wants to run with it... I'm terrible at choosing.
Accent - Utahn, I think. Although I can pull a spanking good British accent, or a damn good red-neck accent if I want.
Booze of choice - Gave up the brew 17 years ago. It's Dr. Pepper or Coke nowadays, usually the "unleaded" variety.
Chore I hate - Dishes
Dog or cat - Dog. She's dumb, but likeable
Essential electronics - Computer... ..?
Favorite perfume(s)/cologne(s) – Old Spice, Old Spice Musk, Oleg Cassini...
Gold or Silver? – Gold
Hometown - Park City, Utah (lived there the longest, anyway)
Insomnia? – Never
Job Title – CAD Designer
Kids? - Four of them... Love 'em more than life.
Living Arrangement - All of us... under one roof.
Most admired trait - Understanding
Number of Sexual Partners - Only my wife.
Overnight Hospital Stays - Not yet
Phobia - I've probably got a few, but I can't think of any right now...
Quote - "I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details." - Albert Einstein
Religion - Yes
Siblings - One brother, one sister, lots of steps and halves in there too (10 sibs total)
Time I wake up - 6:00 am
Unusual talent/skill - Escaping death on the highway
Vegetable I refuse to eat - ? Okra, maybe? I dunno.
Worst habit - Not reading my wife's mind
X-rays - Dental only.
Yummy foods I make - Chicken Salad Croissants, Steak & Cheese in a baguette, Steak, Grilled Turkey & Bacon subs, Bacon Cheeseburgers...
Zodiac sign - Taurus
At this point, I'm supposed to tag 5 of you to pick this up. The floor is open to anyone who wants to run with it... I'm terrible at choosing.
Thursday, April 6, 2006
Guardian Angels Working Overtime
I must be a magnet for near-death experiences. Some of you may remember the day my little car started fishtailing on the icy interstate freeway. Today's incident made that day feel like a picnic in the park.
I was driving down the interstate freeway again, on my way to work this morning. The freeway had a certain amount of compacted slush and ice on it from a snowstorm that had been dumping on us for about 4 hours or so.
So I was zipping along in the middle of three lanes, keeping even pace with the traffic around me, when suddenly, nearly every brake light in front of me went on. I slammed on the brakes, but had hit a patch of slush, and was sliding (quite quickly) toward the car in front of me.
Somehow, I knew that the "fast" lane to my left was empty, and I swerved to the left to miss him, at which time the car went into a wicked fishtail. At that moment, my car did a graceful pirouette back into the middle lane, narrowly avoiding (we're talking mere inches, folks) about six different vehicles (including a large semi-truck) and "kissing" the front fender of the car that I had initially swerved to avoid hitting.
When my car started spinning out of control, there was a very distinct feeling of "My goose is cooked". It was the knowledge that I was not going to come out of this situation in good shape, if at all. Yet, in defiance to the laws of physics, my little car spun around on a crowded interstate freeway, and managed only to come into contact with one other vehicle... and barely, at that.
The Blue Mouse sits in my garage tonight, proudly displaying her battle scar: A three inch scrape on the front bumper. How did the other car fare? About as well. Damage is hardly noticeable.
I'm really at a loss to explain why I wasn't killed, or at least injured on the route today. If you had only seen the crazy way my car was spinning around in between all of those other vehicles, you'd understand.
I was sure to thank God for saving my neck, and letting me live a little longer; letting me love and enjoy my family and friends just a little longer...
I was driving down the interstate freeway again, on my way to work this morning. The freeway had a certain amount of compacted slush and ice on it from a snowstorm that had been dumping on us for about 4 hours or so.
So I was zipping along in the middle of three lanes, keeping even pace with the traffic around me, when suddenly, nearly every brake light in front of me went on. I slammed on the brakes, but had hit a patch of slush, and was sliding (quite quickly) toward the car in front of me.
Somehow, I knew that the "fast" lane to my left was empty, and I swerved to the left to miss him, at which time the car went into a wicked fishtail. At that moment, my car did a graceful pirouette back into the middle lane, narrowly avoiding (we're talking mere inches, folks) about six different vehicles (including a large semi-truck) and "kissing" the front fender of the car that I had initially swerved to avoid hitting.
When my car started spinning out of control, there was a very distinct feeling of "My goose is cooked". It was the knowledge that I was not going to come out of this situation in good shape, if at all. Yet, in defiance to the laws of physics, my little car spun around on a crowded interstate freeway, and managed only to come into contact with one other vehicle... and barely, at that.
The Blue Mouse sits in my garage tonight, proudly displaying her battle scar: A three inch scrape on the front bumper. How did the other car fare? About as well. Damage is hardly noticeable.
I'm really at a loss to explain why I wasn't killed, or at least injured on the route today. If you had only seen the crazy way my car was spinning around in between all of those other vehicles, you'd understand.
I was sure to thank God for saving my neck, and letting me live a little longer; letting me love and enjoy my family and friends just a little longer...
Thank You
Thank you for your prayers, well-wishes and kind thoughts throughout the week. Grandma slipped quietly away Wednesday evening.
Monday afternoon, the decision was made to keep Grandma on life support. She was still semi-conscious and indicated she didn't want to go yet.
Grandma's nurse had come in earlier in the afternoon, recommending some good hospice programs, and so while my wife's mother made phone calls to check on insurance coverage, I asked the doctors some pretty direct questions...
It was determined that moving Grandma to hospice care would deprive her of the breathing apparatus that was currently keeping her alive; that hospice was really only going to make her comfortable before she died. Because her single best chance for survival depended on a large, pimped-out CPAP machine, it was determined that Grandma would stay a little longer in the hospital. Watching her poor, frail body fight just to breathe, I didn't hold out much hope that she'd be with us much longer...
By Wednesday evening, Grandma slipped into a coma. Her brother from Arizona was able to make it to the hospital on time and say his goodbyes. By Thursday, her body had no strength left and began shutting down. She was gone by dinner time.
I think it was hardest for our oldest two children. They'd never experienced the death of someone close to them before. They've lost a great-grandmother, and have two more great-grandparents who are in their 80's, and who are extremely close to our kids. I do not look forward to the day that either of them passes...
Again, thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and kind words this week; they have been much appreciated.
Nilo
Monday afternoon, the decision was made to keep Grandma on life support. She was still semi-conscious and indicated she didn't want to go yet.
Grandma's nurse had come in earlier in the afternoon, recommending some good hospice programs, and so while my wife's mother made phone calls to check on insurance coverage, I asked the doctors some pretty direct questions...
It was determined that moving Grandma to hospice care would deprive her of the breathing apparatus that was currently keeping her alive; that hospice was really only going to make her comfortable before she died. Because her single best chance for survival depended on a large, pimped-out CPAP machine, it was determined that Grandma would stay a little longer in the hospital. Watching her poor, frail body fight just to breathe, I didn't hold out much hope that she'd be with us much longer...
By Wednesday evening, Grandma slipped into a coma. Her brother from Arizona was able to make it to the hospital on time and say his goodbyes. By Thursday, her body had no strength left and began shutting down. She was gone by dinner time.
I think it was hardest for our oldest two children. They'd never experienced the death of someone close to them before. They've lost a great-grandmother, and have two more great-grandparents who are in their 80's, and who are extremely close to our kids. I do not look forward to the day that either of them passes...
Again, thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and kind words this week; they have been much appreciated.
Nilo
Sunday, April 2, 2006
What My Eyes Have Seen...
***Update***
We have a grandma in the hospital that has taken a turn for the worse. They're going to be taking her off of life support in the next few hours, and so... no post today. Sorry.
***Note***
I did promise you a post or two to read on Monday morning.
My bad.
I hadn't counted on my wife coming down with the same plague I had for an entire week. Between the time that I got home Friday night until this moment, there has seriously not been a free minute to call my own.
Well, there was actually a spot of free time this evening, but that was spent in front of the TV, watching "Memoirs of a Geisha." Excellent film, in my opinion; time well spent.
My 6-yr old has the same sickness too, and so I take care of her, while juggling the baby and the 2-yr old while my wife tries to sleep some of this off. All of this while managing to fix dinner, and bathe all four of my kids.
SAHM's: My hat is off to you. Several times over. I can't see myself suriving a career like that, and those of you who run a household have my sincere admiration.
Look for a new post between 12:00 & 2:00 MDT on Monday... I'm heading to bed...
We have a grandma in the hospital that has taken a turn for the worse. They're going to be taking her off of life support in the next few hours, and so... no post today. Sorry.
***Note***
I did promise you a post or two to read on Monday morning.
My bad.
I hadn't counted on my wife coming down with the same plague I had for an entire week. Between the time that I got home Friday night until this moment, there has seriously not been a free minute to call my own.
Well, there was actually a spot of free time this evening, but that was spent in front of the TV, watching "Memoirs of a Geisha." Excellent film, in my opinion; time well spent.
My 6-yr old has the same sickness too, and so I take care of her, while juggling the baby and the 2-yr old while my wife tries to sleep some of this off. All of this while managing to fix dinner, and bathe all four of my kids.
SAHM's: My hat is off to you. Several times over. I can't see myself suriving a career like that, and those of you who run a household have my sincere admiration.
Look for a new post between 12:00 & 2:00 MDT on Monday... I'm heading to bed...
Friday, March 31, 2006
Wanna See Something Crazy?
Tell me this doesn't scare you...
High-Speed Chase Ends After Several Crashes
This news station has nearly the entire chase on video... make sure you see it! You will be amazed...
Evidently, the police started pursuing the car in question because it was suspect in a burglary in another part of town earlier that day.
The number of other cars that this guy crashed into, number of people he injured, amount of property damage that he caused, and the number of lives that he put at risk, just because he didn't "wanna be caught".... Oh man, I was waiting for some serious "Rodney King" action when they pulled him out of that car. I was hoping, anyway. They didn't show anything on TV...
What the hell is wrong with people these days?!?!
The speeding car, which you see get more and more damaged in the chase video (pretty much a worthless wreck by the end) was owned by a local girl. The guy who drove it all over town on the high-speed chase? Someone she met over the internet.
When all you know about a person is what you see on a monitor, be very, very careful. There is really no substitution for knowing a person in real life, and knowing the people who know them.
Some internet relationships actually turn out great, but far too often the person on the other end of the line is nothing like they've portrayed themselves...
In other news, I think I'll be re-vamping the masthead again this weekend... I need something completely different.
Sorry for little to no activity here for the past week. Today is the first day that I think I may actually be over this sickness. It was quite possibly the worst "non-stomach" flu I have ever, ever had. Ick.
I hope you all have a good weekend... I will have a few posts for your perusal by Monday!
High-Speed Chase Ends After Several Crashes
This news station has nearly the entire chase on video... make sure you see it! You will be amazed...
Evidently, the police started pursuing the car in question because it was suspect in a burglary in another part of town earlier that day.
The number of other cars that this guy crashed into, number of people he injured, amount of property damage that he caused, and the number of lives that he put at risk, just because he didn't "wanna be caught".... Oh man, I was waiting for some serious "Rodney King" action when they pulled him out of that car. I was hoping, anyway. They didn't show anything on TV...
What the hell is wrong with people these days?!?!
The speeding car, which you see get more and more damaged in the chase video (pretty much a worthless wreck by the end) was owned by a local girl. The guy who drove it all over town on the high-speed chase? Someone she met over the internet.
When all you know about a person is what you see on a monitor, be very, very careful. There is really no substitution for knowing a person in real life, and knowing the people who know them.
Some internet relationships actually turn out great, but far too often the person on the other end of the line is nothing like they've portrayed themselves...
In other news, I think I'll be re-vamping the masthead again this weekend... I need something completely different.
Sorry for little to no activity here for the past week. Today is the first day that I think I may actually be over this sickness. It was quite possibly the worst "non-stomach" flu I have ever, ever had. Ick.
I hope you all have a good weekend... I will have a few posts for your perusal by Monday!
Friday, March 24, 2006
"...And We Have Taken Different Roads"
It's certainly an exercise in retrospect to think back on childhood friends and look at where everone is today...
Exhibit "A"
When I was eleven years old, one of my best friends was a ninja warrior. Well, OK. He only dressed like one. Being that I was a navy brat, and had to move quite often, I never had a chance to become really "cool", and was usually relegated to the geek group within weeks of moving in. The cool kids could smell lack of coolness on you like a shark can smell a drop of blood a mile away. And the geeks were friendly, and always looking for friends. Anyway, the ninja warrior had a drumset in his basement, and could play quite a few songs very well on it. There was a girl next door named Lisa who was a year younger than us, who was quite cute. I remember seeing her sitting on her doorstep talking on the phone a lot.
The ninja warrior would later become so estranged socially that he would drop out of school. After being involved in a car accident, the ninja warrior became hooked on pain meds, and then later illicit drugs. At last count, he is still living with his mother (in his late thirties.
Lisa, on the other hand, grew up and became even more beautiful, married a nice guy, had two kids... and then one day the guy comes home and says he's tired of being married to her. AND that he was taking the kids with him. After the custody hearing, where Lisa lost custody of her two children, she went home, put a gun in her mouth and took her own life. Her grave isn't quite two miles from my home.
Exhibit "B"
My high school peers. When you're in elementary school, there are very few differences between you and the rest of your peer group, when it comes to the essentials. By the time that you're in high school, these small differences become a bit more pronounced.
Where some of my friends would go on to have average, "successful" careers, others were definitely good at blazing trails of their own.
One friend who was somewhat "normal" began working out, getting buff and ripped and pretty much was your all-around stud. Within a year, he starts practicing witchcraft, and then announces that he's got bi-sexual tendencies. I don't know how to properly convey the expression that came across my face when he said that... "WTF" is such an understatement... We were driving down the canyon one night, and he was going to drop me off at my house and head out with some friends. He was really tense... "What's the matter? You're acting like a virgin on prom night..." "Well, I am in a matter of speaking..." Oh, too much information. I did NOT need to know that!
A few more years would go by, and he would switch back to "playing for his former team", marry a stripper, father a few children, get divorced, and only work an $8 per hour job and live with his parents so that his ex-wife wouldn't get any of his money. And that is where he is today, for all I know.
Other high school friends would become a Navy Seal, a rock musician living in Hollywood, an architect, a professor at Harvard, a career drunk, a writer for the TSR role-playing company, an airline pilot, a stewardess, a TV station manager, one has succumbed to breast cancer, and my best friend would become a financial analyst for a huge energy company in Houston. And I became a designer for a civil engineering company...
Exhibit "C"
When I was very, very young, I had a friend named J.J. He and I were the same age; his mother and mine met in the "alternative" high school for pregnant girls. Our parents kept in touch through the years, and J.J. and I would hook up and hang out every once in a while. The last time I remember seeing him was in high school. We went to the local amusement park, and rode a rickety old roller coaster that must have been nearly a hundred years old. We sat in the very front, and as the coaster roared over the top of a hill (right where it bounces you UP out of your seat?), the lap bar popped open, and J.J. and I were suddenly standing. up. on. the. freaking. roller coaster!!!. We hurriedly sat down, and J.J. turned around and gripped the safety bar on the compartment behind us. He was literally green, and I was probably sheet white....
J.J.'s mother became a born-again Christian, and called up a nationwide radio show, and had the pastor pray for my mom over the radio waves, because she was sure my mom was going to hell.
Understandably, J.J. and I didn't see a whole lot of each other past that point. Our families became a bit estranged. His parents eventually divorced, just a few years after mine. He later moved to Southern California, where he worked for a local university.
One day, while scanning the obituaries, I came across his. He was 32 when he took his own life.
In cases like that, I wondered if there was anything I could have done as a friend, had I been there, to make life slightly more tolerable for him. Is it fair for me to ask questions, or even insert myself into that situation?
I think it's natural for us to ask questions upon the death of a friend or a loved one. Questions about how we rated as a friend, or loved one to these people. Sometimes we blame ourselves for things that happen, and other times (more wisely), we come away having learned a few things.
On the flip side of that, we have people who come into our lives, open up the drapes and let the light in, and brighten our lives by their mere presence... And I have endeavored to have the good sense to learn from them, and turn around and share that light with others that I come in contact with. A smile, a hello, a touch... you may never know whose day you brighten by just one of these... you might even give hope to someone like J.J.
Exhibit "A"
When I was eleven years old, one of my best friends was a ninja warrior. Well, OK. He only dressed like one. Being that I was a navy brat, and had to move quite often, I never had a chance to become really "cool", and was usually relegated to the geek group within weeks of moving in. The cool kids could smell lack of coolness on you like a shark can smell a drop of blood a mile away. And the geeks were friendly, and always looking for friends. Anyway, the ninja warrior had a drumset in his basement, and could play quite a few songs very well on it. There was a girl next door named Lisa who was a year younger than us, who was quite cute. I remember seeing her sitting on her doorstep talking on the phone a lot.
The ninja warrior would later become so estranged socially that he would drop out of school. After being involved in a car accident, the ninja warrior became hooked on pain meds, and then later illicit drugs. At last count, he is still living with his mother (in his late thirties.
Lisa, on the other hand, grew up and became even more beautiful, married a nice guy, had two kids... and then one day the guy comes home and says he's tired of being married to her. AND that he was taking the kids with him. After the custody hearing, where Lisa lost custody of her two children, she went home, put a gun in her mouth and took her own life. Her grave isn't quite two miles from my home.
Exhibit "B"
My high school peers. When you're in elementary school, there are very few differences between you and the rest of your peer group, when it comes to the essentials. By the time that you're in high school, these small differences become a bit more pronounced.
Where some of my friends would go on to have average, "successful" careers, others were definitely good at blazing trails of their own.
One friend who was somewhat "normal" began working out, getting buff and ripped and pretty much was your all-around stud. Within a year, he starts practicing witchcraft, and then announces that he's got bi-sexual tendencies. I don't know how to properly convey the expression that came across my face when he said that... "WTF" is such an understatement... We were driving down the canyon one night, and he was going to drop me off at my house and head out with some friends. He was really tense... "What's the matter? You're acting like a virgin on prom night..." "Well, I am in a matter of speaking..." Oh, too much information. I did NOT need to know that!
A few more years would go by, and he would switch back to "playing for his former team", marry a stripper, father a few children, get divorced, and only work an $8 per hour job and live with his parents so that his ex-wife wouldn't get any of his money. And that is where he is today, for all I know.
Other high school friends would become a Navy Seal, a rock musician living in Hollywood, an architect, a professor at Harvard, a career drunk, a writer for the TSR role-playing company, an airline pilot, a stewardess, a TV station manager, one has succumbed to breast cancer, and my best friend would become a financial analyst for a huge energy company in Houston. And I became a designer for a civil engineering company...
Exhibit "C"
When I was very, very young, I had a friend named J.J. He and I were the same age; his mother and mine met in the "alternative" high school for pregnant girls. Our parents kept in touch through the years, and J.J. and I would hook up and hang out every once in a while. The last time I remember seeing him was in high school. We went to the local amusement park, and rode a rickety old roller coaster that must have been nearly a hundred years old. We sat in the very front, and as the coaster roared over the top of a hill (right where it bounces you UP out of your seat?), the lap bar popped open, and J.J. and I were suddenly standing. up. on. the. freaking. roller coaster!!!. We hurriedly sat down, and J.J. turned around and gripped the safety bar on the compartment behind us. He was literally green, and I was probably sheet white....
J.J.'s mother became a born-again Christian, and called up a nationwide radio show, and had the pastor pray for my mom over the radio waves, because she was sure my mom was going to hell.
Understandably, J.J. and I didn't see a whole lot of each other past that point. Our families became a bit estranged. His parents eventually divorced, just a few years after mine. He later moved to Southern California, where he worked for a local university.
One day, while scanning the obituaries, I came across his. He was 32 when he took his own life.
In cases like that, I wondered if there was anything I could have done as a friend, had I been there, to make life slightly more tolerable for him. Is it fair for me to ask questions, or even insert myself into that situation?
I think it's natural for us to ask questions upon the death of a friend or a loved one. Questions about how we rated as a friend, or loved one to these people. Sometimes we blame ourselves for things that happen, and other times (more wisely), we come away having learned a few things.
On the flip side of that, we have people who come into our lives, open up the drapes and let the light in, and brighten our lives by their mere presence... And I have endeavored to have the good sense to learn from them, and turn around and share that light with others that I come in contact with. A smile, a hello, a touch... you may never know whose day you brighten by just one of these... you might even give hope to someone like J.J.
Friday, March 17, 2006
200+1: A Blog Odyssey
And life goes on past 200.
It was a moment of self realization as I put together the 200th post: I spend way too much time and energy doing this. It's a sad day when you find yourself sending emails in html code...
While my cyber-life has grown in leaps and bounds, it has come at a price: My personal and professional life.
I've recognized the need to devote more time, focus and energy into the "here and now", or in other words, "I need to have my mind where my body is".
And while I won't give up the blog completely, the posts will be a bit less frequent, and written where my personal and work schedules allow.
I'm slowin' down. I guess I've just become a senior citizen in the blog world. I wonder if I get a discount card to use in restaurants and stuff?
This post has been written under the influence of no sleep, and no freakin' time to myself for, like, days now...
It was a moment of self realization as I put together the 200th post: I spend way too much time and energy doing this. It's a sad day when you find yourself sending emails in html code...
While my cyber-life has grown in leaps and bounds, it has come at a price: My personal and professional life.
I've recognized the need to devote more time, focus and energy into the "here and now", or in other words, "I need to have my mind where my body is".
And while I won't give up the blog completely, the posts will be a bit less frequent, and written where my personal and work schedules allow.
I'm slowin' down. I guess I've just become a senior citizen in the blog world. I wonder if I get a discount card to use in restaurants and stuff?
This post has been written under the influence of no sleep, and no freakin' time to myself for, like, days now...
Monday, March 13, 2006
The 200th Post
I have reached the big 200!
While this may be small beans to many other bloggers out there, it's a milestone for me. I certainly had no idea I'd make it this far, and I have no idea how much longer I'm gonna be here... so I'm gonna party now!
I was going to categorize every one of my 200 posts over the past 11 months, but I thought I'd give you the Reader's Digest version instead. Essentially, this means you get some of the more notable posts without too much of the bitchy, whiney or political stuff.
While this may be small beans to many other bloggers out there, it's a milestone for me. I certainly had no idea I'd make it this far, and I have no idea how much longer I'm gonna be here... so I'm gonna party now!
I was going to categorize every one of my 200 posts over the past 11 months, but I thought I'd give you the Reader's Digest version instead. Essentially, this means you get some of the more notable posts without too much of the bitchy, whiney or political stuff.
- I dated a stripper that ended up on Donald Trump's "Apprentice" show last year
- In college, I was friends with someone who supposedly died in a car accident, but there are no records that can confirm this.
- I like to occasionally chase my dog around the yard with the wheelbarrow.
- Sometimes, knowing how to speak Spanish might be really, really helpful.
- I once met someone who built giant igloos in his front yard, made a snowball catapult out of a car jack, and if he really tried, could maintain his fragile grasp on reality for maybe a whole two minutes...
- I sometimes have strange dreams. But my wife has stranger ones.
- I spent my teenage years in Park City, Utah.
- I am an ideal candidate to be a technician who monitors erupting volcanoes.
- I once went to a topless bar in London (I was 17 at the time)
- Never rub your eyes after eating jalapeno chicken wings
- This Blog has had three different names: Four out of Five, Psh. Really., and No Paige Hemmis Pictures Here.
About Me:
- No Judgement Here...
- (Not) Much Ado About Nothing...
- Taken for Granted?
- "Oh, I just gotta be me...!"
- New Baby
- The 100th Post
- Introducing...
- The Soundtrack of My Life
- Hazards of the Job
- Strange Holiday Doings...
- My Bachelor Party
- When I grow up (To be a Man)
Memes & Surveys:
- The MEME
- My Ideal Career
- Oh No, Not Another One!
- Night-Flying Insects, Beware!
- A Meme from Jen
- Stolen Survey
- Yet Another Stolen Survey
Vacations & Trips
- Foreign Exchange Trip: 1986
- It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...
- The Big Trip, Part 1
- The Big Trip, Part 2
- Another Case of Advertising Gone Awry...
- They see you coming a mile away...
- And you thought the price of gas was high!
- Much Needed Break
- The Midlife Crisis moment that was...then wasn't...then was again
- White Fluffy Fire-Breathing Flying Hippopotamus
Fun & Humor
- Polyester Nightmare, part 1
- Polyester Nightmare, part 2
- My hat tip to the Utah Driver...
- My Hero!
- Lost in Translation
- My take on the news
- Thursday Headlines
- More Humor from the Press
- For those unwanted comments
- Christmas Spec Sheet
- Delving Into Geekdom...
- Lighter Side of Life
- I *heart* morning radio
Strange, Deep or Insightful?
- Something In The Air....
- Father's Day 2005
- Stranger in Paradise
- May be good at chewing off a dinosaur's head
- What the McPhuc?
- Metamorphosis...
- Anatomy of a Birth
- My Message in a Bottle (Updated)
- ...and just for a second...
- Redefining A Few Things
- Now about my wardrobe...
- Thanksgiving Reflection
- The Hallucinogenic Value of Cheese
Audience Participation
- Dreamscapes and the Astral Plane
- Jumping the Shark
- Comfort Foods
- Grrrrrrrrr.
- Mmmmm... Cookies!
- Spongy Yellow Bit of Americana
- Crazy Little Thing Called Love
Links to Other Sites
- In Absentia...
- Blogging revealed
- And now, shift gears...
- Just a little Somethin' Somethin'
- Things That Have Made Me Smile Today
- You Rock My World!
- Odds & Ends
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