My car is infected by Microsoft

Yes, the "Blue Mouse" is not doing so hot. Over the weekend, the little "Check Engine" light came on, and so the Mouse was promptly quarantined to our driveway. We plugged an OBD-II reader into it, and the car mentioned something about "catalytic conversion not up to par...yada..yada."

I asked my friend, the Honda Jedi Master about what all of that might mean, since he has the factory manual on the Civic.

Honda Jedi Master: Hmmmmm, powerful is the dark side, yes....
Honda Paduwan (Me): Umm, yes, well that may be, but what's up with the car?"

Honda Jedi Master: Mmmm? Oh yes, new O2 sensor must you have...Mmmmmm..."
Honda Paduwan (Me): Um, can I drive it until then?

Honda Jedi Master: Oh yes, drive it you may. When "Check Engine" light on comes, you are in "Safe Mode"
Honda Paduwan (Me): Whaaa... Safe Mode? Like in Windows?"

Honda Jedi Master: Correct it is, young paduwan. Just like Windows. Keeps you from harming the Honda, it does.
Honda Paduwan (Me): How's that?

Honda Jedi Master: The Fuel Map it changes, so that further harm the engine you cannot until sensor is changed.
Honda Paduwan (Me): Wow....but Safe Mode? Like in Windows?

And then, the conversation took a different path...

Honda Jedi Master: A trembling in the Force there is... A catalytic converter it is that you seek.. Mmmmmmm...
Honda Paduwan (Me): These aren't the droids you're looking f.... Catalytic converter?!? Where did you get that one from?

Honda Jedi Master: Yes! Believe me not? My master you must inquire of!
Hooded Honda Sith: Yes young Jedi, a catalytic converter... I have forseen it...
Honda Paduwan (Me): Um, where'd the creepy guy in the dark robe come from?

Hooded Honda Sith: Join us, young Jedi, or die!
Honda Paduwan (Me): Hey I think it's cool you're calling me a Jedi, but what's up with the dying part?

Hooded Honda Sith (lightning shooting from his fingers): You cannot withstand the power of the dark side!
Honda Paduwan (Me): Alright, alright... Catalytic converter it is! Hey, what's an auto part between friends, right?

Honda Jedi Master: Yes, repair will be made, and in Safe Mode you will no more drive!
Honda Paduwan (Me): Safe Mode? Like in Windows?


Sorry, the lack of sleep must have overcome some inhibition about leaving rants of delirium on my blog. I truly do appreciate my friend and his efforts in diagnosing the problem with the Blue Mouse; he actually knows one of the guys who wrote the factory manual on the Civic for Honda. My hat is off to you, L.W.! You totally rock!