My Bachelor Party

The dirty version . Well, OK, there really isn't a dirty version. This post is in response to a post that Countess put up this morning.

Picture if you will, a warm June evening about 10 years ago. I've been called by my soon-to-be-wife, telling me that I have to keep my evening open, as I am supposed to make an appearance at one of her wedding showers.

*Groan*

I can think of many other things I'd rather do than go to a wedding shower, things like:

• Building a fully functioning suspension bridge out of spam.
• Supergluing my hand to my forehead.
• Scale the Eiffel Tower by the suction power of my own two lips.

So there I sat, waiting for the fiancee to call, when there came a knock on the door. I opened it, to see two friends from school standing there with a pillowcase.

"We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way."

Evaluate options here: Sheer torture of wedding shower, or abduction?

"Okay", I said. And then we were off.

I was spirited away up Parley's Canyon to a summer home area a few miles up a side canyon. These guys had not only kidnapped me, but another friend who was going to be married a week earlier than me. They tied us to a utility trailer and towed us up the three mile long canyon road... did I mention the road was muddy? They spun the tires every time they rounded a corner, plastering us with mud. We arrived at the vacation home, were cleaned up, and had a night of delicious barbecue, loud music, pool and hot tubbing.

Around 10pm, or so, the other guy's fiancee show up at the door with two of her friends. Soaking wet. Apparently, they had caught hold of a rumor that my fiancee was going to be up here, and not to be outdone, this girl and her friends walk three miles up the single lane road. In the dark. In the rain. Did I mention that she also had a broken ankle? So yes, in a cast and on crutches as well. All because she thought my soon-to-be-wife was up here, probably stripping for us. She was a very competitive girl; you would had to have known her.

And so, the other guy's one night of freedom was marred by his dominating woman, a pattern which would continue in their lives for years to come. I, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoyed my evening.

Why such a low-key party, you ask? It was the crowd I hung out with, and this is what we deemed as an enjoyable time. Things would have been completely different had two of my good friends not been teaching English in Seoul, Korea at the time. Then my party would have involved strippers, and probably some livestock as well.

Anyone have any good "Bachelor / Bachelorette" stories?