Or even smile.
Preface: Our family dog has been feeling rather left out ever since the baby showed up on the scene. She's doing what any dog with a hollow space between the ears would do: She is being a very baaaaaaaad doggie, and digging holes in the back yard (learned it from the neighbor dog), chewing up the occasional toy and stealing food from the table and counter.
So, in order to make up for the lack of time spent with her lately, she and I got into a wrestling match on the living room floor last night. And in a deft and surprising move, she used her hind legs to generate roughly 25,632 pounds of thrust as she pointed her nose (a registered projectile weapon) directly at my face.
Ensuing result: Fat Lip. But no ordinary fat lip, this one was gushing blood big time. And then I had this stringy thing hanging off the inside of my lip which I had assumed was just a flap of the "lip lining", but instead, it was "lip guts", or whatever lips are made out of.
I have to be very careful not to smile very broadly over the next few days as my lip heals, or it starts bleeding (Oh, yum) again. And if I laugh, it has to be with more of a frown on my face, which sounds damn near impossible to me.
And I guess I have to avoid spicy foods, too.
In Other News...
This morning I was the driver that I typically scream obscenity-laced obscenities at. Wow, what is happening to me?
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