This could only have happened because of my lack of understanding. Or Maybe a chemical imbalance. Or maybe that cruel bitch known as karma.
Ask anyone who knows me (This may be hard for you to do, since you don't know anyone who knows me, but just pretend, OK?). For at least twenty years, I have been a very outgoing and social person, often going out of my way to introduce myself to people who are new to my neighborhood, or to cultivate business relationships with other companies, etc. Most jobs I have worked since my first in 1985 have required a good degree of interpersonal skill. I thrive on meeting new people. But something is happening. This weekend is a good example of it.
Lately, the amount of things I need to accomplish has been overwhelmingly larger than the time needed to do them. I am getting further and further behind. I am developing a phobia with talking to people on the telephone. I just don't like to do it all that much. I'm selling one of our cars, and someone called up tonight asking for information, and I just couldn't wait to get him off the phone. And while selling our car might be a grand pain in the ass, trying to find another to buy is going to be worse. Why? Because I am not a people person right now. I watched the movie "The Aviator" the other night, and I could really relate to the desire to lock yourself in a room for several days and shut the world out. I wouldn't, however, wander around naked and unbathed like he did, watching movies over and over and peeing in bottles. I'm not THAT eccentric.
This all may be a by-product of starting a new job as well. After working for my previous employer, who paid people a poverty wage, I'm not used to a company who is paying me pretty well for what I do. I keep expecting Donald Trump to materialize and say "You're Fired!" Add that to the car selling/buying woes, the ever-growing to-do list, and my blood-sugar problem, and there's probably a very good explanation for me feeling the way I do. I feel empty and depressed. I think I need a motorcycle.
This has been an unusual look into one of Nilo's inner demons, which don't get much air time on the blog. And there is a pretty good chance this post will be deleted when he gets feeling better.
